


Can't Hold On

by Tiggyloo



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon), steven universe future - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Corrupted Steven Universe, Gen, blood and slight gore (later chapters), corrupt steven theory, slight body horror
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-01-20 20:22:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21287633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiggyloo/pseuds/Tiggyloo
Summary: The Gems had discovered Steven's worsening corruption after his attempts to hide it had failed. It's been many weeks since they found out, and they've been trying nonstop to find a cure. They had to believe there was a way to fix this, some way to stop it from getting even worse, but time was starting to run out. || this story is based on the Corrupt Steven Theory
Comments: 47
Kudos: 407





	1. Pain

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I started this story when we had nothing more than the opening sequence and maybe a couple promo images, and that's more or less how I plan to end it. A lot of this story will contain inaccuracies in regards to canon because of this, and will also use several personal headcanons about corruption and the relevant theory itself.

“Night lights are for kids.”

“You are a kid, Steven.”

Pearl was crouched in Steven’s room by the bed, plugging a small night light into a socket. The light was shaped like a sun behind a cloud. She had gotten it from Greg earlier; he said it used to be Steven’s when he was very young, before he moved in with the Gems. She had only just told Steven about it a few minutes ago, as it was getting late and he’d be going to bed soon.

Steven mumbled something as Pearl stood up and she put her hands on her hips. “You haven’t been able to sleep almost at all for the past five weeks, Steven. Not since…_this_—” she gestured to the small horns protruding from Steven’s skull “—Started happening.” She sighed.

“Pearl, I—I’m fine, I just—” Steven stammered as Pearl sat next to him on his bed.

“Listen, Steven…I know this is all hard. It’s hard on everyone. We’re all doing our best to find a cure for this…or at least something to stop it from getting worse. Just, work with me. This…this is the best I’ve got, okay?” Pearl placed her hand on the boy’s and gave it a squeeze.

The other Gems were off searching for _something_ today. It was Pearl’s turn to stay home. Next would be Amethyst’s, then Garnet. They’d been taking turns watching him and going out, watching him, going out, ever since they discovered his corruption. It would be several days before the small party of two returned to swap out. Steven was never allowed to join them.

He’d hidden the corruption from them. They noticed changes, but didn’t think much of them; he started wearing sneakers one day, wearing a hooded jacket another. Steven had claimed that he was just trying new clothes, and that was that. Nothing too out of the ordinary for Steven. Those excuses, however, did not work for long.

He had dark purple splotches visible on his hands and legs, four inch long horns coming out of his head. He had claws on his hands and feet. His whole body felt sore. And ever since this started he’d been having…hallucinations at night when he’d try to sleep. They’ve gotten worse in the past couple weeks. There are things in the dark, things Steven knows aren’t real but at the same time their presence is so _strong_.

“I think the light will help, Steven,” Pearl said gently. “I know you don’t want it. But a little light can keep things away. It’s worth a try.”

Steven looked at the little night light in his wall and rested his head on Pearl’s shoulder. She was probably right. He hoped so. He was so tired…

“I’m scared, Pearl.”

Pearl hummed sadly and put her arm around him.

“We all are,” she said quietly, rubbing his arm. They were all so scared. When the pool didn’t work, even with the Diamonds, they had all started to panic, _including_ the Diamonds. Spinel took it especially bad. She’d been crying into Steven’s jacket for a solid thirty minutes when the healing pool didn’t work. Her first real friend in six thousand years was…losing himself. No one wanted that. Certainly not her.

Everyone was terrified.

Pearl stood up. “Try and get some sleep tonight,” she said, leaning down to give Steven a kiss on his forehead. He smiled up at her. Ever since this started she’d been giving him kisses. It helped, just a little bit. Pearl went and switched the night light on, turned the lights off, and quietly walked down the stairs. Steven didn’t hear the door close. She never closed it completely.

The night light gave off a soft yellow glow. Not much, but enough to cover the majority of the room in a vague light. The darkness wasn’t so crippling tonight.

Steven settled himself under his blanket and stared at the light. He stared for a while. He looked around his room. Nothing was standing in the shadows to watch him. That was good. With a small amount of comfort in his heart he closed his eyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He slept for several hours. More than he had been recently. But it was still dark when he woke up, a sudden pain in his sides forcing him awake. Steven had never felt a pain like this. It was scorching hot yet freezing cold, the pain so extreme that he almost _didn’t feel it_. His agonized yell brought Pearl barreling up the stairs to his room and the lights came on.

Steven’s body had reacted so violently to the pain that he’d fallen to the ground, writhing and groaning, tangled in his blanket. His eyes were shut tight and tears were streaming down his face.

“Steven!” Pearl yelped, running over, but she froze when Steven’s eyes snapped open. They were black, pure black, irises white and glowing, and they bore right through her. He was growling at her, a sound so guttural and aggressive that she actually stumbled back a few feet.

Steven appeared to be fighting himself, his expression changing from anger to pain to fear and back again in a grotesque distortion of emotions. He managed to kick away the blanket, only after slicing a few holes in it with his claws. Pearl gasped.

Two new additions to the corruption had taken form. A pair of dark purple arms had sprouted from his sides and pushed through Steven’s shirt, moving in a spasm. They stretched and twitched and grabbed at nothing and everything while Steven continued to growl and moan on the floor.

Pearl swallowed the lump in her throat and stepped closer to Steven. His eyes were closed again and he was breathing heavily, squirming painfully, growling, whimpering, and wailing. Pearl didn’t know what to do. She reached out toward him.

Steven screamed a deep, gravelly scream when he sensed her closeness and blindly lashed out. Pearl let out a sharp squeal and fell backwards when he connected. Steven’s claws had slashed down her arm and caught her knee. The light that made her body shone brightly from the cuts for a few seconds before the spaces reformed, leaving what looked like scars. She’d been slashed and cut and stabbed and received every other menagerie of injuries one could think of, but _nothing_ had quite felt like _that_, nothing had ever left _marks_ like that.

The noise she made, the look of shock and fear on her face, it _did_ something to Steven. His growling stopped abruptly, replaced by a high-pitched crying and his eyes went wide. He was shuffling backwards and bumped into his bed. Pearl couldn’t read his expression. She couldn’t speak. She couldn’t even cry. She didn’t know what was happening.

Steven had pressed himself against the bed frame and was shaking so hard Pearl swore she felt it. Then Steven was crying out again, falling onto his side once more as he gripped his head. His claws dug into his skin, his new pair of arms mindlessly grabbing at each other. A few long minutes went by before the boy’s breathing, while still heavy, calmed down. If Pearl had a heart it’d be pounding in her chest.

Steven slowly looked up. His eyes were back to normal, aside from the pure, unrestrained fear pooling in them. Tears finally started falling down Pearl’s cheeks.

“P-Pearl?” Steven almost whispered, his voice hoarse. He saw his own fear reflected in her shining eyes.

He suddenly felt something…wrong, more wrong than before. His hands moved away from his head as he looked down his body. He scrambled up off the ground in a panic when he saw the arms twitching at his sides. It almost appeared as though they were trying to mimic the others as Steven moved. His terrified gaze locked with Pearl’s.

“Pearl!” he cried, quickly crawling over and throwing himself around her. He felt her flinch hard when he touched her. “I-I’m sorry-y, Pearl! I didn’t-want to hu-rt you. I-I didn’t mean to-!”

Finally, Pearl managed to shake herself out of her frozen state, looking down at Steven sobbing into her chest. His claws held her in a death grip. Her movements started slow, hesitant. Her mind was racing.

Then her arms came up in a flash and pulled Steven in. Tears flooded from their eyes as they sat in each other’s presence. Pearl felt two more hands latch onto her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The warp pad activated and there stood Garnet and Amethyst, looking exhausted. It was around five in the morning and the lights were dimmed. The pair walked into the main room, faces downcast and hands empty.

“No luck, I assume,” came Pearl’s soft voice from the couch. The others didn’t reply. Or, they _couldn’t_ reply. Garnet and Amethyst could only stare at Pearl, who was holding Steven ever so delicately, and Steven, who was lying against Pearl, asleep—and with two new arms draped on either side of her.

No one said anything for a long time. Amethyst dropped to her knees. Garnet gripped the kitchen counter to steady herself. Pearl didn’t look up from Steven’s sleeping form. She heard Garnet’s form waver and her eyes shut tight as Amethyst rose to her feet to try and comfort Garnet before she split. The purple Gem talked softly, doing her absolute best to keep her voice steady while the other tried to hold it together.

Pearl was listening helplessly. She and Amethyst had talked to Garnet previously about this whole thing, and Garnet said, no matter how many times she tried, that she couldn’t see a future where they stopped this. Of course, she’d been wrong before. There were things that she never saw that happened. So they kept going, kept searching, but it was getting so hard to continue. They continued _because_ Garnet’s been wrong before. But the longer they went, the less likely it seemed that Garnet even _could be_ wrong about this. There were hundreds of possibilities, all pointing to failure.

Eventually Amethyst managed to calm Garnet down enough that she stopped morphing. That’s when Pearl looked up. They all looked at each other.

None of them could last much longer like this.


	2. Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things had calmed down since the incident with Pearl. Now, it was Garnet's turn to stay home with Steven. She wanted to go out, to talk with him. It would just be for a few hours.

Chapter 2 – Silence

It had been three weeks since the incident with Pearl. Steven had slowly been getting used to having two extra arms, and could now, somewhat, control them independently from his actual arms. Which was…strange for everyone. But most of the time the arms just mimicked his actual arms. Pearl had also over those few weeks taken it upon herself to cut and line some holes into some of Steven’s shirts to accommodate the additional arms. Other than that, nothing else had happened, thankfully. Well…there was _one_ thing.

It was Garnet’s turn to stay with Steven. He hadn’t left his room for two full days except to get something to eat and/or drink or to use the bathroom. He’s said as many words to Garnet as she had fingers. The silence was deafening. He didn’t even want to go outside anymore. Typically, she’d take him with her down to the beach at least once during her shift, as he no longer liked going into town. 

She couldn’t stand it any longer. The next time Steven came out of his room she’d say something.

Several hours she sat on the couch by herself, waiting for Steven to show himself. Her arms were crossed and she was tapping her fingers impatiently, stressed beyond belief. Cat Steven was sitting in her lap, purring up a storm, which at least helped a little. And she didn’t seem fazed by Steven’s transformation, which certainly helped him too. Even Lion had distanced himself from Steven, so the little cat still cuddling up to the boy calmed his nerves a bit.

Garnet heard footsteps coming from Steven’s room and looked over toward the stairs. She waited to see where he was going before standing up. He went to the fridge to grab something, and when he turned around he saw Garnet had blocked the stairs back to his room. She looked very determined to not let him through.

Steven glared at her for a few seconds before sitting at the counter to eat.

“Don’t give me that look, Steven.”

He scowled and looked down at his food.

“Steven. You need to get out of your room.”

He said nothing.

“How about we go out? We don’t have to go down to the beach this time. We could take the warp somewhere.”

Steven put his food down, thinking. That was probably a good sign. After a few minutes however, he went back to eating. Garnet sighed.

“Stev-”

“Fine.”

“…Where would you like to go?” Garnet asked next, deciding to leave the stairs and join Steven at the counter. He glanced up at her. He looked down. Garnet put her arms on the counter, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Please, Steven. I need you to talk to me.”

“I don’t want to talk,” he stated, leaving the counter to put his plate in the sink. He looked to the stairs for a moment before returning to his stool.

“At least tell me where you want to go.”

“I…I don’t know. The…” Where _did_ he want to go?

Nowhere. But Garnet wouldn’t accept that answer.

“The flower field.”

“You’re allergic to the flowers there, Steven.”

He groaned quietly. “Okay. How about we go to mom’s fountain? The garden.”

“That sounds like a nice place to visit.”

Steven let out a long sigh.

Garnet reached across the counter and took Steven’s hands in her own. Her gems felt cold on the back of his hands but at the same time the sensation was oddly comforting. This was the first time she was able to touch him since she had taken her shift. He felt…guilty.

“Let’s go, Steven.”

“…Okay.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Garnet was following Steven around the garden as he silently inspected the roses. _At least he’s outside,_ Garnet thought. _But I wish he’d talk_.

The roses were beautiful, as always. Most of them were the standard red, while new colors had started to crop up around the garden: yellow and white roses had bloomed in several clumps, as well as orange-y roses mixed with the red. All the flowers were lovely.

As they walked Steven had started picking roses, grouping them together and handing them off to his waiting purple fingers. The imagery almost made Garnet laugh. The corruption’s hands were larger than Steven’s, and therefore could hold quite a few roses, and the thorns didn’t seem to bother him as long as the corruption held them.

After a while of this Steven stopped walking and looked back at Garnet. For the first time in a while Garnet saw a spark of happiness in his eyes.

“The roses are so pretty,” Steven remarked, picking another from a bush. He pinched the thorns off before holding the flower out to Garnet, who accepted it with a smile. “They were a good choice for mom.”

“That they were,” Garnet agreed, and they continued walking.

Eventually they circled back to the fountain, where the two sat beside the water. Steven had started gently tossing the roses he’d collected into the water and watched them float peacefully over the ripples. He still wasn’t talking much, but he did talk more in the last few hours than he had in two days, which lifted some weight off Garnet’s shoulders. And yet, something bothered her about all this.

“Steven, why don’t we try a conversation again?” Garnet asked.

Steven paused mid throw, and then after a moment finished the toss. “I don’t really want to talk.”

“Please, Steven. Talking is good. It helps. Just try.”

“I don’t _want_ to,” he grumbled, his calmness fading fast. “All I ever do is talk! I’ve got thousands of years worth of _talking_ to deal with already, and even more _problems_. I don’t…I don’t hate mom. But it’s so hard dealing with everything she left. How many times have I almost died in the last four years? How many Gems that I’ve never even heard of have showed up to try and kill me, or kidnap me, or put me on trial? I had _nothing_ to do with any of this!”

The roses were having their petals plucked from the stems.

“I’ve had to deal with all of this being put on my shoulders. All of this stuff I had nothing to do with. All these Gems. All this talking. All of _you_. Just, constantly piling things on me! All because I have my mom’s _stupid gem_!”

The last of the flowers were thrown to the ground as Steven grabbed his head. Garnet watched in silence, her hands shaking.

She finally realized what was going on. All of this, it was all…_their_ fault.

“S-Steven…we, we didn’t…why didn’t you say anything?” came her quiet voice as she reached out to place a hand on him.

He swatted it away.

“Don’t touch me!” he growled and Garnet’s whole body stiffened as pitch black eyes turned to glare at her. He then growled again, this time in pain, and fell to the ground. Garnet forced herself to reach out her hand again but before she even got close to Steven his foot collided with her.

The kick was harder than she ever could have expected. The force threw her into the water, and after the shock faded she pushed herself above the surface and frantically grabbed at the edge of the fountain. She coughed a few times and shakily pulled herself out, collapsing on the grass.

Steven was gone. She saw a path of ruined rose bushes where he’d ran off.

Garnet was on her hands and knees.

“I-it’s all our fault,” she said under her breath. “All of this. We, we never stopped to consider what our actions were doing to Steven. All of us just…poured everything out on him. We never listened to him in return. We all failed to protect him so many times—” 

She curled her fingers around the grass as tears started to fall from her eyes.

“It’s my-_our_-fault. We, I couldn’t have, you-ahhh! It’s our fault!” 

Garnet’s body came undone in an instant and down tumbled Ruby and Sapphire.

Ruby started pounding the ground. “He’s been bottling up everything for years! We should have noticed! We should have _done_ something!” she cried as Sapphire slowly got to her feet.

Sapphire was an absolute mess. She could barely move as she processed everything. He never said a single word. Everything, bottled up inside, the emotions, they were breaking through. It’s why Steven’s corruption was so unique. That’s why they couldn’t stop it.

“It’s all finally manifesting. Steven’s losing himself to his emotions…his body can’t take it,” Sapphire whispered, arms wrapped around herself.

Ruby looked up at her partner, hot tears falling from her face and burning the grass.

They heard a pained cry in the distance.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Steven didn’t know why he was running or where he was running to. His legs had just acted on their own. His head was throbbing and pain rushed over him in waves. How long had he been running already? 

He pushed through the rose bushes almost like they weren’t even there. The thorns stuck and scratched and tore his skin and clothes, but he didn’t even notice. Flowers were crushed beneath his feet, petals, leaves, and thorns littered his body. He kept running.

He ran until he couldn’t run anymore, and yet his feet kept going.

Everything looked different. The _things_ were back, but no longer did they hide in the shadows. They were right in front of him, beside him, reaching out to touch him. He had just been with Garnet. Everything was fine, it was fine, why wasn’t it fine, it wasn’t fine, it wasn’t, it was bad, _bad, **bad**._ The shadows kept trying to grab him. There were so many shadows.

Steven’s foot caught a root and he hit the ground hard. He was scrambling to get up but he couldn’t, his arms and legs were too weak. The shadows were encircling him, coming closer and closer. Their limbs reached out, but never touched. Steven screamed and curled up, covering his head, folding his body into his knees, hiding, making himself as small as possible. He wanted it to stop. Everything needed to stop. _It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts_—

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ruby and Sapphire had tried re-fusing at least five times but it wasn’t working. They couldn’t stay stable. There was just too much, too many wild emotions. So they were running, hand in hand, following the path of crushed roses Steven had created. Tears still flowed from their eyes as they followed his sounds. This was their fault, it was all their fault. Why did they push, they shouldn’t have pushed him. They should have just left him alone. Why didn’t they see this? Why didn’t _Garnet_ see this?

Garnet couldn’t see _anything_. And now she can’t see at all. She couldn’t come back, not now. The fear, the panic, the chaotic thoughts were all too much for Ruby and Sapphire to handle.

Follow his sounds. All they had to do was follow his sounds, and his path, and they would find him. They would find Steven and take him home to the others. He could stay in his room for as long as he wanted then.

Sapphire came to an abrupt stop and Ruby was almost yanked back off her feet.

There they stood, on the edge of a flattened circle of rose bushes, and there was Steven, his forehead pressed against the ground, his hands clutching the back of his head.

Sapphire started whimpering and Ruby pulled her close. Both fell to the ground in sorrow. Steven was worse. They’d made it worse. He was starting to look more monster than human as his corruption grew.

Thorny spikes broke through the back of Steven’s jacket and traveled down around his spine, where they continued to line the top of a thick, dark purple tail.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Steven sat huddled in the corner of the couch. Ruby and Sapphire embraced a few feet away. Tears were falling. There were no words spoken. The house was quiet.

The warp pad activated.

Pearl and Amethyst walked into the main room, talking quietly to each other in a desperate tone. They hadn’t noticed the others at first, but when they did they stopped dead in their tracks. The two small Gems lifted their heads.

“R-Ruby…Sapphire,” Pearl said, moving her trembling hands closer to her chest. “No, no, no…Steven…”

Pearl and Amethyst both looked toward the boy, who didn’t look back. He didn’t even acknowledge their presence. He was barely even moving.

All were silent.

The silence was roaring in their ears.


	3. Patience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steven had been alone long enough. Amethyst had called Greg and Connie over and whether he liked it or not, she was going to get him out of that room.

Ruby and Sapphire had told the others everything that happened when they had taken Steven to the fountain. They repeated everything that he had said to them—to Garnet. They all had to take a few days off after that revelation. Ruby and Sapphire still hadn’t been able to fuse. Steven had remained in his room ever since they got back that day. He very rarely came out now, only to use the bathroom, which was far less frequent now that he stopped eating and drinking almost entirely. He never said anything when he came out. The Gems had to bring him food, but he hardly touched it. At most half of it would be gone, but usually none of it was touched. He was at least drinking one glass of water every couple days though, which still wasn’t much but it was more than the food.

Amethyst was knocking on Steven’s door now. She’d called Greg and Connie over today, and the two wasted no time in showing up. Steven had refused to let either of them visit for two and a half months and Amethyst had had enough. She was torn apart over everything Ruby and Sapphire had told them, but she wasn’t going to let that stop her from doing something for her friend. She’d already explained everything that went on the last several months-it took about three hours-and told Greg and Connie that they need to stay calm when seeing Steven. Sapphire had told Pearl and Amethyst that it seemed that when Steven started feeling strong negative emotions is when he would begin to lose control of himself. 

“Come on, Steven, open up!” she said, continuing to knock on his door as Greg and Connie waited at the bottom of the stairs. She had been trying this for about ten minutes. “You know I can just get through the cat door! And we can warp in there too, there’s no point in ignoring me.”

The Gem knocked a few more times before throwing her hands up and saying, “Fine! Don’t open the door, we’re still coming in!” before turning around and descending the stairs.

The two guests had taken residence on the couch. Connie was hugging her bag and Greg was nervously tapping his foot, his shoulders tense and his fingers gripping the cushion. They looked over as Amethyst appeared with a groan.

“Come on, we’re taking the warp in,” she stated, arms crossed. The other two didn’t move and she huffed. “Let’s go! Chop, chop, we don’t have all day!”

Greg and Connie looked at each other before standing up. “Amethyst, are you…sure about this?” Greg asked as they joined the purple Gem. “I mean, after everything you told us, don’t you think this is…well, risky?”

“We want to see Steven _really_ bad,” Connie added, clutching her bag tighter. “But we’re worried about this. He could react badly. I…I don’t know if I can stay as calm as you need me to.” 

“Don’t you think I know that? But we need to try! Steven _needs_ to be with someone. He says he wants to be alone but I _know_ he’s lying. He doesn’t want us to see him, that’s it. But he doesn’t want to be alone. Just—just don’t _stare_. And don’t go running around either, or freaking out, or anything else. We can do this.”

She spun around and marched to the warp pad, and after a moment Connie and Greg followed.

The warp in Steven’s conservatory lit up and the three appeared on the platform. They didn’t see Steven, so he must have been in his main room. Lion was there, though, but he’d pulled his bed to the complete opposite side of the room, as far away from the stairs as possible. He rumbled when they showed up and crawled over to shove his head against Connie.

“Hey, Lion…are you okay, buddy?” she asked, swinging her bag over her shoulders and grabbing the big cat’s face. He growled gently and licked her wrist.

Amethyst showed up beside them and gave Lion a pat on the head. “He’s nervous, I think. Or scared? Maybe both,” she said. “Ever since this whole thing started he’s been avoiding Steven. I never really expected the big guy to abandon Steven like this but…I guess I can’t blame him, you know? It’s sad, though. I think it really hurt Steven.”

Lion nuzzled Amethyst before sulking back to his bed.

“I’m sure he just needs more time to get used to this,” Greg piped in, trying to sound optimistic. “Anyway, uh, how about we go see Steven?”

Amethyst just nodded and led them to the short flight of stairs out of the conservatory.

They found Steven on his bed in the dark with his window curtains closed, and with the night light on. Cat Steven was stretched out on the boy’s pillow, her tail gently tapping out a slow rhythm. Amethyst had told them what to expect but neither were truly prepared to see Steven like this. The spikes, the tail, the arms, it was all just so much to take in.

Amethyst went to turn the lights on and a quiet growl came from Steven’s throat when he heard her walking around. The lights flicked on then and the growl stopped as Steven curled tighter into himself.

“Steven!” Greg gasped and started to run over, but was quickly cut off by Amethyst.

“_What_ did I tell you?” she hissed. The sudden noise from Greg must have agitated Steven, because he had started to growl again. Greg took a step back and looked toward his son, then back to Amethyst.

“I-I’m sorry, it’s just…” He cleared his throat. It had just been so long since he had been able to see Steven that he acted without stopping to think. “…Sorry.”

Amethyst sighed and moved out of the way. With Greg calmed down, Steven also went quiet, and Greg continued over to the bed. Connie remained by the stairs as Greg sat on the bed above Steven’s head.

“Hey there, Schtu-ball, how ya’ been?” he asked, forcing himself to act as casually as possible, despite everything screaming in his head. 

Steven didn’t answer, which Amethyst told them would likely be the case. Greg rubbed his neck and looked over to the Gem, who shrugged back. She really wanted this to go well, but she knew they couldn’t force anything. They had to be careful and take their time, and maybe give Steven just a _small_ push.

“How are you able to be so…calm about this?” Connie asked, coming just a little closer to the group.

“I’m _not; _I’ve just been _able_ to gather enough self control to _look_ like I’m calm. Acting crazy won’t help Steven, I told you that,” Amethyst replied, waving her hand at the aforementioned teen. “We’ve all done enough of that already. I just think the best thing right now is to stay as chill as we can and take some time to _be_ with him. Whether you want us to be here or not.” She directed the last part at Steven who just sighed in response.

Cat Steven mewed as Amethyst hopped onto the bed, annoyed at being disturbed so much. She stretched and jumped off the bed, then trotted over to and up the stairs to the conservatory. Connie watched the little cat leave before finally taking a spot on the bed as well, her hands tight around the straps of her bag. Amethyst was sitting at Steven’s feet, while Connie took the space behind him. He remained still.

Amethyst’s face fell as she looked down Steven’s body. There was nothing new, but the spikes, the claws, the horns, had all gotten longer. Not by much, but it was enough for her to notice.

Connie had started shuffling through her bag. Papers and pens and who knows what else rustled as she searched until she finally found what she’d been looking for. 

A book.

“Hey, Steven,” she said, her voice cracking. She coughed and nervously leaned over Steven to hold the book where he could see it. “I brought this for you. It’s the first book in the spin-off series to _The Unfamiliar Familiar_. I know how excited you were when I told you about it, so I got it for you.”

Steven shifted slightly so that part of his face peeked out from behind his arms. He scanned the book cover for a few seconds before lifting his hand and gently pushing it back to Connie.

“You don’t want it?”

He shook his head and raised his hand further so that he could touch the cover with one of his claws. The visitors watched curiously as the corner of the paper cover separated from the rest as Steven dragged his claw down and the piece fell to the bed.

“…Oh, I get it. You’re worried you’ll tear the pages if you read it, right?” Connie asked, taking the book away.

“Mhm.”

“How about you read some of it to him?” Greg suggested. “After all, it’s nice to be read to every now and then.”

“That’s a great idea!” Connie said with a smile before adjusting into a more comfortable position. Reading would be a good way to keep her nerves from going haywire. She opened the book, cleared her throat, and started reading.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

She read for about twenty minutes and managed to get through the first three chapters before she was cut off by Steven’s stomach growling. He let out a tiny groan when it happened and Connie put the book down.

Amethyst sighed. “Steven, have you eaten _any_ of the food I’ve given you today?”

Steven shook his head. He pointed to where all the food was, in a corner of the room, untouched.

“Why haven’t you eaten anything?”

He shrugged. His stomach growled again.

“Do you want something to eat right now?”

He did nothing, then nodded.

“What do you have for him?” Greg asked as he gently ruffled his son’s hair. His brows furrowed when he took his hand away and he rubbed his fingers together. They felt _very_ greasy. “Steven, when was the last time you got a bath?”

Steven muttered something that sounded like “three weeks”.

“That’s when Garnet…” Amethyst began, but her voice trailed off before she finished. “There’s a lot of stuff in the fridge for him,” she said instead. “Pearl left me instructions on how to make all of it since I’m not really…a good cook.”

Steven made a noise of agreement which made the others chuckle. “At least you still have some of your humor left,” Amethyst said, patting Steven’s leg.

“How about you two go make him something to eat and I’ll help him get washed up,” Greg suggested, getting off the bed. He turned and rubbed Steven’s arm. “Do you want to go downstairs yourself or do you want me to carry you down?”

Steven thought for a while before holding all four of his arms out toward his dad. Greg nodded and scooped the boy up into his arms, being careful to avoid the spikes on his back. “You’re doing great, Greg,” Amethyst told him before she and Connie also got off the bed. Steven clung to Greg’s t-shirt as they all walked down to the first floor of the house. It relieved Amethyst that this was all working out so well. She _knew_ that bringing Connie and Greg over would help. The only thing is that she didn’t know _how much_ it would help. That was something they’d just have to wait for. All they had to do was be patient.

Connie and Amethyst looked through the list of instructions Pearl left to find something to make while Greg took care of Steven. Pearl left…_a lot_ of instructions, so it took quite some time to actually find something they thought Steven would want. They ended up picking some kind of vegetable stir-fry and got to work.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Steven wasn’t really cooperating all too well as Greg tried to give him a bath. He wasn’t fighting with Greg or anything, but he certainly wasn’t helping his dad either. He undressed without much of a fuss but now he was just sitting in the tub, leaning against the wall as Greg let the water fill up. His dad had tried to convince him to wash himself but Steven made it a point to ignore him, focusing his tired eyes on the faucet instead. Greg sighed and grabbed the washcloth off the shower rack.

“Amethyst told us about everything that’s been happening,” he said as he started to wash Steven off. “We had no idea how bad this had gotten. I mean, you haven’t really been talking to me or Connie for a while now. She’s been stopping by the car wash with her folks a lot recently too, wondering how you’ve been. ‘Course, I haven’t really been able to give much of an answer.”

Steven pushed the water around.

“Guess you’re still not in the mood for talking, eh, Schtu-ball?”

Steven simply shrugged again.

“Well, that’s alright. You don’t gotta talk if you don’t feel up for it.”

After about ten or fifteen minutes Steven had started to take some of the cleaning over from his dad. He grabbed the shampoo and silently began to wash his hair. He had to take a lot of time doing it though, because if he didn’t he’d hurt himself with his claws, or cut himself by rubbing against the horns sprouting from his forehead. Steven had tried filing the claws before, but none of the files he had could even put a scratch on the nails. He hadn’t bothered with the horns.There were actually a number of scabs over his body where he’d accidentally cut himself already, too.

There was a long silence between the two. Steven had apparently finished with his hair (really, he just stopped in the middle of it) so Greg figured _he’d_ just finish that part too. They had probably been in the bathroom for forty minutes by the time Greg finally was able to start rinsing all the soap off.

Steven closed his eyes and sighed. “What’s going to happen to me?” he asked, catching his dad off guard. “The Gems haven’t been able to find anything to help me…I’m just getting worse. I don’t want to hurt anyone, dad. I, I don’t—”

Steven sniffed and a tear ran down his cheek.

“You’re going to be okay, Steven. You’re not going to hurt anyone,” Greg told him, doing his best to be reassuring.

“Don’t lie to me!” Steven snapped at him and Greg pulled back, eyes wide, as the boy snarled with pointed teeth.

A look of shock took over Steven’s face a moment later and he slapped his hand over his mouth as more tears fell. He didn’t mean to yell. Why did he yell? He didn’t know.

Greg couldn’t come up with a response, so he just reached over and grabbed a towel after unplugging the drain. “Um…here, Steven. Dry yourself off and I’ll get you some clean clothes.”

Steven nodded and got out of the tub.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Amethyst and Connie had been busy cutting up and frying the vegetables and the food was almost done when they heard Steven’s outburst from the bathroom. They looked at each other and Amethyst was about to check on the other two but was interrupted when Greg appeared. 

“I-is everything okay?” the Gem asked, trotting over to the man. He scratched his chin and looked back to the door. “_Greg_!”

“Uh—y-yeah, everything’s fine. He’s okay,” Greg said, though his tone wasn’t very convincing. “Can you show me where his clothes are? I uh, noticed those…_modifications_ on the dirty ones…can I assume Pearl did that?”

“Yeah, that was Pearl. I’ll show you where she put them. Connie, can you take care of the food?” 

Connie gave a thumbs up in response. She went back to finishing up the stir-fry as Amethyst led Greg back up to Steven’s room. A few minutes later Amethyst was back with Connie and Greg was back with Steven.

“This is going way better than I was expecting,” Amethyst commented as Connie looked for the plates. “Too bad you guys can’t stay here all the time.” She sighed and leaned against the counter with her arms crossed.

“Amethyst…if this gets…worse, what’s going to happen?” Connie asked quietly. Amethyst looked to the floor. 

“I’m not really sure. None of us are.”

“What if he turns into a monster? Like the other Gems had?” Connie asked next as she turned the stove off. “He doesn’t poof…and we already know the pool doesn’t work.”

Amethyst looked up to see Connie shaking. “Hey,” she said, pushing off the counter and going to Connie. “Listen. Whatever happens, we’ll figure something out. We’re not going to lose Steven, okay?”

Connie stood still for a few seconds before walking away from the stove. “Just put the food on the plate,” she muttered as she dragged her feet to the couch. Amethyst hastily did as she was told, placed the plate of food on the counter, and hurried over to Connie.

That’s when Steven and Greg came out of the bathroom. Amethyst looked over to them, then turned around and went back to the counter. Steven walked over as well, though he was looking at Connie while he did so. She was sitting with her knees hugged against her chest.

“Here, Steven. You don’t have to eat it all if you don’t want to, but maybe try to eat, like…most of it?” Amethyst said, placing the plate of food and some utensils in front of Steven as he sat at the counter. He sat without answering and pushed the food around the plate a bit before starting to eat. Greg sat next to him and patted his shoulder while Amethyst returned to the girl on the couch.

She sat next to her and gave her a nudge. “If it’s worth anything, you and Greg have been a huge help today. You guys were definitely what Steven needed right now. I couldn’t have gotten him out of his room by myself,” she said with a big smile. Connie looked down at the Gem and gave a little sigh before smiling back.

“I guess so…but still, it’s. Hard. To see him like this. Steven was always so happy and carefree. And now? Now he’s just…_that_.” Connie motioned over to him. They were talking quietly enough that Steven and Greg didn’t seem to hear them, which was probably a good thing. Connie didn’t exactly want Steven hearing this.

“You know, I almost didn’t come today. After you called I had a thought…that maybe I should just stay at my house. I didn’t know if I’d be able to do this…to see Steven like this. Really, I still don’t know. I don’t know how much longer I can put up this guise of ‘everything is okay and I’m definitely not literally about to have a panic attack’. I’m really glad us being here has gotten Steven to…_do_ things. But what happens when we leave? What happens when Steven stops listening to us too? What happens when this all inevitably gets worse? We _all_ know it will, so what will we do when it finally _does_ happen?”

“…I don’t have an answer for you, Connie.”

“I know you don’t.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Everyone was back in Steven’s room. The sun had gone down not long ago, and Connie had gone back to reading while Steven rested his head on her lap. His tail had started thumping against the bed as she read which was amusing to the others. It was a good sign though, because it meant he was feeling at least a little happier. And of course no one said anything about it, because then it would stop.

Connie had mentioned earlier that Greg should probably take her home soon, but when Steven heard that he looked distraught to say the least. He hadn’t said anything about it of course, but Connie called home all the same and her parents had allowed her to stay the night. She’d taken Lion back home after that so that she could get her stuff and be back as fast as possible as to not upset Steven. Greg had also decided to stay; after all he had to make sure Steven got a good breakfast.

Connie got about four more chapters into the book before Greg cut in.

“I think it’s about time you kids get some sleep, don’t you think?” he said from the floor. Connie hummed and stuck a bookmark between the pages and returned the book to her bag. Steven made a sound of disappointment and sat up as Greg stood. “There should be more than enough room on the couch for both of us.”

“That’ll be fine,” Connie said, turning to hop off the bed. She felt something pull on her shirt before she could get off and she looked back to see that Steven had grabbed her. 

“C-can you stay with me…?”

That was the first thing he’d said to her all day. It broke her heart.

Connie looked over to Greg and Amethyst.

“Um…I guess that would be okay?” Amethyst said with a small shrug. “Could help.”

“I…don’t _think_ it would be a problem as long as you’re okay with it,” Greg said to Connie. “There should be some extra blankets and stuff that you could use.”

The girl turned back to Steven as he released her shirt and she smiled at him. “Yeah, I can stay.”

With that decided Greg went and found the extra blankets and started to set them up next to Steven’s bed. Steven sat quietly on his mattress the whole time, watching. 

Soon after Connie had finally settled into the blankets and Amethyst and Greg had left her and Steven in the glow of the night light. She was listening to Steven’s breathing, which was calm but uneven, coming from his bed. She heard him shift around every now and then and he’d huff before quieting down again. _Poor Steven…_

More moving around, more huffing. He was starting to sound less calm and more frustrated. Frustrated wasn’t good. Sapphire had told Amethyst that too much frustration caused changes. Quite a bit of time went by like this. Connie felt her heartbeat pick up. All of this, it was driving her insane. She was scared and worried and helpless as Steven grew more agitated.

More moving. 

More huffing. 

This time it was louder. Closer.

Connie felt the nest of blankets she was in fall under a new weight.

Steven had crawled off his bed and was nudging his way under the covers next to Connie. She stayed still and said nothing as he slowly arranged himself beside her, twisting and turning his body to keep his spikes from getting near her as he tried to get comfortable. Connie felt his breath against her forehead as he eventually managed to find a position that suited him.

Carefully, Connie moved her hand away from her chest. Her fingers brushed against Steven’s arm and she felt him pull it away. His skin had been cold and rough against her fingertips. Her hand moved upwards. Steven made a noise, a low, quiet rumble as his hand met Connie’s. His touch was warm and soft as he held onto her. He took in a deep breath and Connie could feel his whole body start to relax as he exhaled.

“I didn’t want to hurt you or dad,” the boy whispered into her hair. “I was scared, so I pushed you both away.”

“But, we’re here now, even if you didn’t want us to be. Even if you still don’t.”

“I’m sorry…”

Connie moved a few inches closer and rested her head beneath Steven’s chin. She heard the rumble come back and felt a cold hand move to rest on her waist. The noise slowly faded as Steven drifted off and Connie closed her eyes.

Steven couldn’t be fixed. She knew this. She heard it in his voice, felt it in the rumble of his chest. The boy was slipping away.

No amount of love and patience would make this stop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos! I'm very glad so many people are enjoying this fic. Also an extra big thank you to those who have been reblogging this story on Tumblr! This was a longer chapter, and I imagine they'll probably only get longer as I continue writing. We'll see!


	4. Aggression

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything happened so fast.

Connie woke up the next morning to the sound of growling.

She yawned and rubbed her eyes before propping herself up on her elbow. She blinked a few times to clear away the blurriness, noticed Steven was no longer beside her, and turned to look at the source of the noise. Lion was standing by her feet, crouched down in a defensive stance, his back facing her.

This wasn’t good.

Hesitantly, the girl stood up and walked along Lion’s side, gently brushing her fingers along his fur. His head shifted to look back at her for just a moment before it turned forward again. The growling never stopped.

Connie froze.

Backed into the corner of the room was Steven, down on the ground, growling right back at Lion. He was positioned in a way that showed off the spikes on his back and his tail was thumping against the wall in agitation.

However, that’s not what stopped her. What stopped her were the changes.

Not only were his eyes pitch black, but what looked like thick plating traveled along the top of his corrupted arms. Long spikes stuck out from his shoulders, and there were two large, sharp, curved teeth protruding from either side of his jaw. Connie took in a sharp breath when Steven’s eyes fixed on her. There wasn’t even a _shred_ of humanity in that gaze.

She felt her chest tighten and she gripped Lion’s mane.

“Lion, t-take me downstairs,” she choked out. Lion looked at her again, then quickly but gently lifted her up over his head. His eyes were on Steven as he walked to the stairs, a snarl on his face, then he was through the doorway.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Greg had started making breakfast not too long ago, and Amethyst was lying on the couch. She sat up when Lion hurried down the stairs from Steven’s room. He rounded the corner of the coffee table and crouched down to allow Connie to slide off his back, which she did slowly, and she almost fell over when she hit the floor.

“Connie? What’s wrong?” Amethyst asked, jumping off the couch. Connie was shaking and her breaths were short and fast. She tried to answer but no sound came out so instead she just leaned against Lion and shook her head.

Greg had looked away from the stove when he heard Amethyst’s concerned voice. “Whoa! Okay, hold on,” he said a second later, shutting off the burner before running over. He grabbed onto Connie, who now looked like she was about to collapse, and helped her stand up a bit straighter.

“I know what this is. She’s having a panic attack. I’m going to take her outside for a bit until she can calm down. Amethyst, do me a favor and go check on Steven, something must have happened,” he said, and Connie nodded a confirmation. “Do you want to go outside?” Greg added, and Connie nodded again.

“Alright. Uh, be careful, Amethyst.”

“Right.”

Greg started to lead Connie to the door while the Gem ran up the stairs. She stopped at Steven’s doorway, feeling uneasy. She didn’t hear anything…she wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. Cautiously she entered the room.

Silence.

She looked around and saw Steven in the corner, poking at his teeth. He looked up when he felt her gaze on him, staring back with eyes all black.

“Amethyst?”

“S-Steven…”

“Where’s Connie?”

“You…” She glanced back at the stairs. “…Don’t remember her leaving with Lion?”

Steven had a concerned look on his face when she turned back.

“Lion was here?”

Amethyst sucked air through her teeth. _Okay, that’s not _great.

“Uh…what’s the last thing you _do_ remember?”

Steven’s brows furrowed. “I…I was with Connie last night…I fell asleep, but I woke up over here? I don’t know how I got here. Did something happen? Did I do something? I’m worse, that means something happened, right? What happened?!”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay! I don’t think _anything_ happened. Not really. Connie seemed fine…I mean, mostly. She was kind of shaken up but she wasn’t, like, hurt or anything?”

“That means I did something!”

Amethyst scratched the back of her head and went over to Steven, who had started shaking. “Okay, um, how about we just go downstairs? We’ll ask Connie to explain what happened,” she suggested, holding her hand out.

Steven looked but didn’t take it, instead holding his own hands close to his body. Amethyst cleared her throat and her arm dropped to her side. “Let’s just head down. You gotta get breakfast, too; Greg was almost done making it.”

Steven glanced to the doorway and got up.

He couldn’t stop thinking about _whatever_ had happened just a few minutes ago. Why couldn’t be remember? He _usually_ remembered when something happened. And he changed again? But it was different this time. The last two times something changed it had _hurt_. This time he felt _nothing_. The teeth and spikes were just _there_. His claws trailed along the wall as they descended.

When Amethyst and Steven reached the landing a loud growl started up. Lion, who was sitting by the door, had turned when he heard footsteps and started snarling at the two on the stairs. “Lion, chill out!” Amethyst said, holding her arms out. “What’s wrong with you?”

The growling just got louder, and also doubled, and Amethyst looked over her shoulder to see Steven returning the growl. Her eyes widened and she cursed under her breath as she ran down the remainder of the stairs.

“Get! Shoo!” She started pushing Lion away, or tried to, but he wouldn’t budge. Groaning, she shifted into Purple Puma, opened the front door, and shoved the big cat outside. She heard Greg say something as she did this, but didn’t bother to listen further before shifting back to her normal form. The noise from the stairs stopped and when she looked over she saw Steven standing there, staring at her with a dazed and confused expression.

“Amethyst…?”

She took a deep breath. “Come sit down, Steven.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Greg and Connie had come back in not long after, and Amethyst made sure that Lion stayed _out_. Connie was looking a bit better now, though still somewhat nervous and fidgety. Greg went and finished making breakfast for everyone and stayed with Steven at the counter while Connie and Amethyst ate on the couch.

“Hey, Connie…what happened this morning?” Amethyst asked in a hushed tone. “Like, you’ve seen all kinds’a messed up stuff by now, and you’ve never freaked out like _that_. I mean, I can _guess_ what happened. When I brought Steven downstairs, Lion started growling at him? And he…started growling _back_?” The Gem rubbed her neck. “Is that what happened with you?”

“…There was nothing left of Steven,” Connie replied, laying her plate on the coffee table. “All the noise woke me up. I don’t know why Lion came down from the observatory; maybe he sensed I was in some kind of…danger? But, I wasn’t…at least, I don’t think I was. They…they were just _snarling_ at each other. Steven looked at me, and there was…nothing. Those eyes weren’t Steven’s. I mean, they still aren’t I guess? But they’re still _human_. The ones I saw this morning weren’t.”

Amethyst puffed out her cheek and looked over at Steven and Greg. She didn’t really _look_ at Steven earlier when this happened to her. She hadn’t noticed what Connie did.

“Does he know about his eyes?”

“I’m not sure,” Connie said. “Greg _probably_ told him, though.”

There was a pause and Connie reached over and gently grabbed Amethyst’s hand. The Gem looked away from the kitchen and saw tears in Connie’s eyes. “Aw, man…maybe you should go home.”

The girl took in a deep breath and closed her eyes before rubbing the tears away. “Maybe…I don’t know. I’m…scared that I’ll have another panic attack. But, I don’t want to leave Steven. It’s just going to get harder to see him again if I do.”

“…Yeah, you’re probably right about that,” Amethyst agreed with a quiet groan as she laid her head on the back of the couch. There were a few minutes of silence before Connie spoke up again.

“I think what he’s doing is a threat display.”

Amethyst picked her head and gave a confused look.

“This morning, Lion had come down and, given what happened with you, my guess is that Lion started showing aggression toward Steven first before I woke up. A lot of animals will respond to aggression with threat displays. It’s when they try to look bigger, or make loud noises to try and scare the other animal off.”

“But Steven’s not an animal.”

“No, but corrupted Gems practically are. When he feels like he’s in danger those instincts must kick in. That must be why it hasn’t happened around us. We aren’t a threat.”

“But—”

“Amethyst, I don’t want this to end like that, but come on. You can’t deny it. Look at what’s happening! You guys have been trying for months to stop this but you can’t. He’s corrupting just like the others and we can’t do anything about it!”

Amethyst just stared for a while. Of course she was right, they all knew that. She opened her mouth to reply, but a scratching sound suddenly started up from the door, cutting her off. They both looked over and saw Lion sitting outside with his paw on the doorframe. He watched the two on the couch and scratched again.

“Hey, uh, guys?” Greg said from the counter, “Something’s up with Steven.”

Steven had gone rigid, his gaze locked on the door as Lion scratched at the wood. He started pushing soon after, which caused Steven to raise his shoulders and his tail started twitching.

Amethyst quickly stumbled off the couch and ran to the door as Lion started to push, but just before she reached him the door slammed open. There was a clattering sound behind her and she looked back to see that Steven had knocked over his chair in a panic and was now on the floor, a low grumble coming from his throat.

Lion had also looked over at the sound and he and Steven stared at each other for a few seconds before the cat took several steps forward. Steven started growling louder when he did this, and Lion growled in turn, his fur raising.

“Whoa-kay, everyone needs to calm down,” Greg said in a hurry and tried to pick Steven up but the boy wasn’t having any of it. He squirmed out of Greg’s arms, his thorny spikes cutting through his father’s skin, and snarled at him, which made Greg flinch away. Steven then backed up a few feet, his claws cutting grooves into the wood, and turned his attention back to the lion slowly advancing toward them.

“Greg, you might wanna move!” Amethyst called, shifting into Purple Puma.

“Don’t have to tell me twice,” Greg answered and hurried to the other side of the counter, where he grabbed a napkin to take care of his bleeding arms.

Amethyst grabbed Lion’s tail and started dragging him back, but he was fighting with her, and eventually spun around to swipe his claws at the Gem, causing her to instinctively release the lion’s tail. He then roared at her, which threw her back against the wall. She grunted and fell to her knees as Lion turned back to Steven.

Before she could get up, Lion lunged forward.

His attack came to an abrupt stop, his claws just inches from Connie’s face. The girl, who had been sitting frozen on the couch just seconds before, had practically thrown herself off and, without thinking, planted herself between Steven and the big pink cat. Slowly, Lion lowered his paw, but he didn’t stop growling, and neither did Steven.

Connie’s heart was racing. The others were just staring. She took a long, deep breath.

“You _need_ to _leave_.”

Lion snorted in response and started to stalk around her, but she stepped over to block his path again.

“Leave him_ alone_.”

Lion tried to go around her again, and again she cut him off. They did this a few more times until Lion finally gave an aggravated groan and backed away. Glaring eyes rested on Connie as he ascended the staircase, and then he was gone.

Connie slowly turned around as Steven’s growling quieted down and Amethyst hurried over. “How’d you know that would work?”

“I…didn’t,” Connie admitted. “I just had to _do_ something. I didn’t really stop to think about it.”

“Well, luckily it worked out,” Greg said. “Though, let’s hope it doesn’t happen again. Might not work a second time.”

“Yeah…”

She sighed and they all looked at Steven.

“You think he’s okay?” Amethyst asked, walking past Connie. Steven looked at her and started growling again, causing the Gem to take a step back.

“Okay…maybe we should wait a minute before trying to go near him,” Greg suggested. “You don’t wanna end up like me.” He forced a chuckle and Amethyst gave him a sympathetic look.

Connie looked back and forth between the two, then to Steven, who appeared to be calming down, but slowly, and who was still letting out a quiet grumble. He looked up at her and Connie saw those angry eyes once more.

Steven’s eyes finally started to change, the anger fading, and Connie took a step toward him. He didn’t growl, which was good, so she took a few more steps. Amethyst glanced at Greg, then Connie. “Uh, be careful. This is…different from the last time.”

She nodded and hesitantly crouched down in front of Steven, who just stared at her. His gaze followed her hand as she slowly started to reach out. He blinked a few times and shook his head before sitting up. Connie looked at Amethyst, who gave a motion telling her to continue.

“How is he?” Greg asked as Connie’s hand finally rested against Steven’s cheek. The boy blinked again and leaned his head into Connie’s touch.

A few seconds went by before he asked, in a soft voice, “What happened this time?”

“Um…Lion tried to attack you,” Amethyst told him. “Connie got him to go upstairs before he could hurt you, though.”

Steven lifted his head and looked over at his dad. Greg quickly hid his arms behind his back but wasn’t fast enough to prevent Steven from seeing the red cuts. His eyes went wide.

“D-did I do that?” he asked, his voice trembling.

“It was an accident, kiddo, don’t worry about it,” Greg told him, but Steven just looked more upset. “Listen—it wasn’t your fault. I’m the one that grabbed you, okay? You didn’t do it on purpose.”

“It doesn’t _matter_ if it wasn’t on purpose,” Steven said as tears started streaming from his eyes—now an all too common occurrence. Before he said any more, Amethyst grabbed his face and made him look at her.

“Steven, I need you to calm down. We can’t have another one of those _episodes_. Just look at me and breathe, okay?” she said gently before taking in a deep breath. Steven did the same, though his was quite a bit shakier.

Then the exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Inhale.

Exhale.

“Feel better?”

“No,” he said, but he definitely sounded calmer. Amethyst patted his cheek and straightened up.

“Hey, Steven?”

Steven looked to Connie, who had stood up and now had her hand held out to him. He carefully grabbed it and she pulled him up off the floor.

“Let’s go sit on the couch. I can read some more, if you want.”

He nodded and followed her, while Greg came out from behind the counter.

“I’m gunna’ take care of this,” he said and headed to the bathroom while Amethyst went to join Steven and Connie.

She hopped up and looked over to the warp pad. “I wonder when the others are gunna get back,” she mused, kicking her feet. “I think…when they get back, maybe it’ll be time to talk about this again…”

A soft rumble came from Steven and Amethyst didn’t say anything else on the matter.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Greg had finished patching himself up, and all were on the couch, listening to Connie read. Steven had curled up on the cushions, with the back of his head pressed against Connie’s leg. Cat Steven had joined them and was stretched out along Steven’s side, which Steven had tried to prevent her from doing, but the little cat was quite stubborn and wouldn’t take “no” for an answer.

Thankfully, Lion hadn’t shown up again. Amethyst had gone to check on him and he had been asleep in his bed. Hopefully he’d stay there for a while. They certainly didn’t need _that_ happening again. Connie suggested maybe taking Lion to stay at her house, which might work, but at the same time he could just teleport back whenever he felt like it. It was something to think about, though.

For a while everything was fine. It was peaceful.

But of course the peace couldn’t last.

A sudden blinding light flashed from Steven’s gem. It fizzed and glitched and pulsed and Steven’s cry sounded broken, distorted. Cat Steven scrambled onto the back of the couch as the teen’s body convulsed before he fell to the ground. It happened so fast that the others couldn’t even react until it was already over.

“Whoa, what was _that_?” Greg said, quickly standing up, but Amethyst’s hand darted out and caught the man’s shirt. Greg looked at her and she tugged him back down.

“Hold up, Greg. We gotta be careful, okay?” she said and Greg looked at his son for a moment before giving a hesitant nod.

“Connie, you good?” Amethyst said, turning to the girl. She looked a bit shaken, with her eyes locked on her friend. It took her a moment but she nodded before pulling her legs up to her chest.

“I-I think so,” she muttered. “Is…Steven okay?”

Amethyst shifted her gaze to Steven, who had lifted himself off the ground, panting heavily. Two shaking arms held him up while the other two were pressed against his stomach where his gem still flickered. He didn’t seem…_feral_ like before, but it would probably be a good idea not to jump in and help right away, just in case.

The three on the couch waited silently while he caught his breath. His gem blinked a few more times before the light finally faded out and Steven let out a moan before mumbling, “I feel nauseous.”

The others released a collective sigh and Amethyst got up, hopped onto the coffee table, and stepped down before heading over to the Temple door.

“Where are you going?” Connie asked, anxiety high in her voice.

“I’m getting the others back! I’m not waiting anymore. I just have to get my Warp Whistle, I’ll only be a few minutes,” Amethyst called back. “Just help Greg with Steven, okay?”

She disappeared through the door and Connie put on a concerned look, which only worsened when she heard a rather unpleasant sound from behind her. Turning around, she saw that Steven had propped himself up on the coffee table and had started dry heaving. His gem was flickering again and his claws were digging deep grooves into the table as Greg did his best to offer some comfort.

“Uh—I’ll see if there’s something to help in the kitchen,” Connie said, pushing herself off the couch. They had to have something for nausea _somewhere_. But, then again, this did seem to be coming from Steven’s gem, so even if she did find something, who knows if it’d work.

Back at the couch, Greg had managed to get Steven on his feet. The dry heaving had stopped and was replaced with coughing and gagging now—not too much better, but still better.

“I’m going to take Steven to the bathroom. I think I remember leaving Steven with some nausea pills a while ago, try to find those,” Greg said and Connie waved an acknowledgment. She was searching through all the drawers trying to find something. Frustrated, she climbed onto the counter and started looking through the cabinets on the wall. After quite a lot of searching she finally found the pills shoved in the very back of one, along with a random assortment of other over-the-counter medications. Did Steven ever even use these?

Connie heard the Temple door open and out came Amethyst. She didn’t even announce herself before blowing into what Connie could only guess was the Warp Whistle. The warp pad lit up and Amethyst ran around it, stopping short when she spotted Connie on the counter.

“Uh, you should probably not be up there.”

“Sorry. I just had to find something,” Connie told her before carefully climbing back down onto the floor. She held the pill bottle up for Amethyst to see, then they both looked back to the warp pad as the light beam disappeared.

“What happened?!” Pearl gasped, running over to Amethyst and grabbing her shoulders. “Where’s Steven? Is he okay?” she asked, shaking Amethyst a little and looking around. She straightened up when she saw Connie, looking a bit surprised. Amethyst removed Pearl’s hands with a huff and crossed her arms, which brought Pearl’s attention back.

“Steven’s…well he’s not good, duh, but he hasn’t gotten _drastically_ worse,” Amethyst told the others. “And he’s been eating and drinking and talking a lot more since I invited Greg and Connie over.”

“Greg’s here?” Ruby asked as she and Sapphire appeared at Pearl’s side. Connie joined them, the pills in one hand and a glass of water in the other, looking sadly over at the un-fused Gems.

Amethyst sighed and motioned to the couch. “Greg’s with Steven in the bathroom right now. Something happened with his gem that made him feel really sick. We can wait for them.” She paused and rubbed her arm. “…We all need to talk about some stuff.”

That left an unpleasant aura over the group as they all waited. Silence stretched out among them, finally being broken by the creak of the bathroom door. Steven looked a little better but definitely still sickly as he followed his dad.

He stopped walking when he realized the other three were waiting with Amethyst and Connie. Without a word, the others watched as he sat at the far end of the couch. Connie took a deep breath and went over to him.

“Um…here, this should help you feel better,” she murmured, handing him the glass and a couple tablets. He took them silently as she returned to her spot, bringing her knees up to her chest again.

A few minutes later Amethyst groaned and ran her hands down her face. “Alright…Let’s get this over with. We can’t avoid this conversation anymore. How much longer are we going to warp out of here, searching for something we _know_ we can’t find?” she said, throwing her arms up. “There’s nothing _to_ find. We’re all just wasting our time at this point. No one wants to admit it, but we are. I’m tired of it! Steven’s not getting better and we can’t do anything about it! We have to accept that!”

The others just stared at her, unable to say anything. Then they all turned to Steven.

He’d started crying.

Amethyst had a guilty look on her face, but she couldn’t take back what she said. She didn’t _want_ to take it back. No matter how hard it hurt, it was the truth. Yet, the guilt remained, and she looked away.

“I’m sorry,” Amethyst choked out. “There’s just nothing we can do.”

“…She’s right,” Sapphire said, wiping tears from her face. “Steven needs us here. We shouldn’t leave him anymore. There’s no point to it. Nothing is going to get accomplished.”

“I w-want to see Gar-net,” Steven cut in, the words skewed by his heavy sobs and hiccups. “P-plea-se. I w-ant to see her one m-more time.”

“Steven, don’t say it like that,” Pearl said, her voice wavering. “Please, don’t say it like that.”

He didn’t respond. All he could do was cry.

Ruby jumped off the couch and tugged Sapphire with her.

“I-I don’t know if I can,” Sapphire said in an almost whisper as Ruby held her face.

“Come on, we have to try. We’ll force it if that’s what it takes.”

“We’ve…never _forced_ Garnet, before.”

“We’ve never _had_ to. I don’t want to do it, but if that’s what it takes, then we’ll do it. It’s for Steven.”

Sapphire looked over to where Steven was watching them through shining tears.

“Come on, Sapph, you can do it,” Amethyst said. Pearl nodded and Greg gave a thumbs up. They were all doing their best to be encouraging, but it was so painfully difficult.

Sapphire bit her lip and gripped Ruby’s hands tighter. “Okay.”

Steven hid his face as the two small Gems lightly touched their foreheads together. The others watched in choking silence as Ruby and Sapphire came together in a bright light, then came apart, then back together again. The light was shaking, fighting to keep form, and after much too long a time, the form finally held.

The light dissipated and Garnet was down on her knee, exhausted from the strain of reforming. The others immediately moved to hug her, but her arm lifted and cut them off. She then forced herself upright and, on trembling legs, walked over to Steven. He looked up at her, his sobbing starting all over again as she crouched in front of him.

He wrapped his arms around her and wailed into her chest.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Everyone talked for a long time after that. Their voices were quiet and solemn as they discussed what their next steps down this road would be. Steven had been clinging to Garnet the entire time, curled in her lap. They all decided that, no, there was no reason to continue going out. There was nothing else they could do for Steven except to just be there with him until this ended, in whatever way it would.

No one wanted to talk about the end, though.

Steven’s grip on Garnet suddenly grew tighter and his claws dug into her back. She sucked air in through her teeth and the talking came to an abrupt halt. Steven’s gem was flashing again as Garnet tried to loosen his grip on her.

He wasn’t letting go. He heard the others’ voices, panicked as they tried to get through to him, but he couldn’t understand. Their words were drowned out by the ringing in his ears. The ringing was loud, so loud. The ringing was followed by heavy thudding, except that wasn’t in his head. Steven opened his eyes.

Lion came thundering down the stairs, slammed into the wall when he hit the landing, and vaulted down to the first floor. Everyone jumped to their feet and Steven dropped from Garnet’s arms, his hold on her failing as Lion appeared. He crouched on the ground, his growling loud and fierce as Lion approached with glowing eyes and shining teeth.

The feline roared, throwing everyone and everything out of his path before they could make a move to stop him. He didn’t allow them back on their feet, quickly letting out another blast, aimed directly at Steven. The force was so strong that it threw the boy against the Temple door and he fell to the ground. He shook his head after a moment and started snarling, pushing himself against the door as Lion charged.

The Gems tried to stop him but he managed to dodge every attempt. He was determined to get to Steven and was not going to be blocked off this time. Lion’s paws hit the ground hard before leaping over the warp pad. In that moment the Temple door opened and Steven fell through with a startled cry, his claws marring the wood floor as he failed to hold his ground. Then the door shut, just in time for Lion to collide headfirst into it.

Lion collapsed to the ground but was quickly on his paws again, shaking his head wildly to force off the dizziness. He started pacing and turning circles in front of the door then, stopping with every pass to scratch, growl, and roar in frustration. His fur was standing up as his anger grew.

He crouched down in surprised as Garnet summoned her gauntlets. Lips curled in a grimace, Lion looked back to the others. He looked both baffled and furious that Garnet and Amethyst had started coming closer, their weapons at the ready.

“Wait! Don’t hurt him!” came Connie’s frantic plea as she ran out in front of Garnet and Amethyst, leaving the couch where Pearl was trying to calm Greg down after having to watch his son almost get mauled.

Connie had her arms outstretched, acting as a shaky barricade. Garnet growled and her gauntlets disappeared, but Amethyst still gripped her whip.

“We do not want to hurt him, but we must get into the temple and Lion is in the way,” the taller Gem said, trying to keep her voice calm. She was already struggling to hold her form, and it was obvious that this event had just made that even harder. Worry was on Connie’s face and her heart was beating fast, but she held her ground all the same.

“Something is really wrong, Connie,” Amethyst said, pulling the girl’s attention away from Garnet. “A lot just happened, and I don’t know _what_ you were looking at, but _I_ was looking at Steven. He got _pulled_ into Rose’s room and with him being in that state who knows what he’s doing in there?”

Connie looked back at Garnet, to Amethyst, to Garnet again. With a deep breath she dropped her arms and turned around to face Lion, who’s ears perked up slightly when she looked at him. She took a step toward him and he puffed out a growl, making her stop short. Not wanting to rile him up again, Garnet motioned for Amethyst to put her whip away. “If we don’t appear as a threat maybe he’ll let us in,” she said, and Amethyst grumbled but did as instructed.

Still, Lion kept his defensive posture as Connie tried to get closer. Her hands were shaking as she held them out in front of her. “Lion, you need to get out of the way. Please just move,” she begged, followed by a yelp when a large paw swung at her. Immediately Garnet and Amethyst were at her side, Amethyst grabbing Connie and pulling her away as Garnet summoned her gauntlets again.

“Sorry, Connie, but we have to get in there as soon as possible!” Amethyst said as Connie struggled in her arms. “Pearl, how’s Greg doing?” the Gem called a moment later and Peal responded with a “Doing better,” as Greg took a few deep breaths. This really just went from bad to worse.

Everyone’s attention went to Garnet and Lion as he started to roar, but the attack was cut off as large gauntlets clamped around his muzzle. He growled and pulled back as Garnet tried to move him, shaking his head back and forth but she couldn’t be knocked away. With a tremendous amount of effort, Lion was tugged off his feet and thrown across the room. “Pearl, Amethyst, quick! Into the Temple!” Garnet shouted, slamming her hand against the door as the gems to her room lit up. “We’ll have to travel through the Temple to reach Steven. Be cautious when we reach him—there’s no telling what we’ll—”

She was cut off as the whole Temple rattled, almost knocking them off their feet. They heard Lion snort a moment later as he stood up. “Get over here, now!” Garnet commanded and the others ran over. Connie also joined them, shoving Pearl’s arm away when she tried to keep her back.

“No, I’m coming too! I want to help!”

“Ahhh! We don’t have time for this!” Garnet interrupted before pushing everyone through the door. She heard a loud protest from Greg but didn’t stop to answer. Lion was running back and the last thing they saw before the door closed was his mouth opening.

The Temple shook again and dust and debris fell from the ceiling, burning into ash as the pieces splashed into the lava pool in the center of the room.

“What the heck’s he doing up there?” Amethyst said, holding her arms over her head to block the bits of rock.

“We have to get up there before the Heart gets damaged,” Pearl said and the others nodded. Connie looked confused but didn’t ask questions. Those could be asked later; right now they had to focus. She grunted when she felt Garnet’s arm around her and she was lifted off her feet.

“Let’s go.”

Climbing through the Temple was becoming more difficult with every passing minute as the crystal tubes they were scaling were bombarded by debris. Connie clung to Garnet for dear life as pieces of the Temple fell and smashed around them. Amethyst was breaking some of the pieces apart with her whip, which helped but not by much. The Temple was rattling almost constantly now from whatever was happening in Rose’s room and Pearl nearly got hit by a falling rock, causing her to slip but Amethyst was able to catch her before she fell too far.

“This is getting to be impossible!” Pearl yelled after Amethyst swung her back up. “Whatever Steven’s doing is getting out of control. He’s going to bring the Temple down at this rate!”

“That’s why we must hurry,” Garnet said with a grunt as she punched through a rock. Connie yelped and quickly shielded herself with her arms as the pieces tumbled down around the two. She was starting to think that maybe she _should_ have stayed back with Greg. It was too late to turn back now, though. She was stuck here whether she wanted to be or not.

There was no more talking between them after that. All their focus was put towards getting to Steven. They climbed through several rooms, none of which were explained to Connie. She could guess to whom they belonged to, but only in fleeting thoughts. She couldn’t think straight anymore, her mind unable to focus on anything for more than a second or two, if that. Everything was just too loud and crazy right now.

They climbed for what felt like ages but finally, with one last crack of Amethyst’s whip, they arrived. Garnet handed Connie over to Pearl so that she could enter first to assess the situation. She came back a few seconds later with a fearful look on her face. “It’s…very wrong,” was all she said before slowly leading the others up.

None of them were prepared for what they saw. The room was dark, black clouds swirling throughout with rain pouring down in all directions, following the howling wind. Strange pillars of various sizes and shapes littered the room, and in the center was a large tower-like structure full of holes. At the top was Steven down on his knees, bent over himself with his head hidden under his arms, his gem flashing blinding light like lightning in the storm. His body looked distorted, mutated, far beyond what it was before. The spikes along his back had grown, his limbs were unnaturally long, and even with as far away as the group was it was clear that overall Steven’s size had almost tripled.

And, standing in front of him, was something…some_one_, someone that looked familiar but at the same time so very foreign.

It disappeared suddenly—

—And materialized in front of the others in a burst of cloud.

They all reeled back at the site.

What stood before them was a shifting amalgamation of both Rose and Pink Diamond, their features blurred together and ever changing as she—_it?_—came closer.

“Steven doesn’t want you here,” it said, sounding like a dozen voices in one as an arm came reaching toward the group. Amethyst threw her whip out, cutting straight through the figure, and for a moment it disappeared. They saw it reappear at the top of the tower, then heard something else poof into existence in front of them.

Before anyone could register what it was, Amethyst was hit with an uppercut that sent her into the air, then was slammed back down, throwing the others back. With a groan she picked herself up, shook her head, and scrambled back once she finally saw what had attacked her. Standing in front of her was a large shadowy creature, a huge, toothy grin the only thing visible on its head. It looked almost human, in a disgusting kind of way.

Amethyst narrowly dodged another attack and stumbled to her feet. “Guys, what’s going on? What the heck _are_ these?!” she yelled, blocking a punch. She was knocked to the ground a moment later as her legs were swept out from under her and she snorted. She could already tell that this was going to be _very_ hard.

“Steven’s hallucinations! This is how he described them,” Garnet answered, throwing one away from herself. “They must have manifested from the room’s magic.”

“How is this happening? The room should only be conjuring what Steven tells it to! He couldn’t be telling it to make these, could he?” Pearl cried soon after, parrying a few attacks with her spear. She huffed and forced the creature back as best she could before jumping away to try and gather her senses.

At least now they knew why the Temple was coming down around them earlier.

She yelped as the cloud monster formed behind her and knocked her to the ground. Garnet passed by, a third creature hot on her heels, as Amethyst continued to struggle with her own. Meanwhile, Connie, not having brought her sword, hurried to find a hiding place. She spotted a nearby pillar and made a beeline for it.

“We don’t know what Steven’s telling the room to do, but we know he doesn’t want us here,” Garnet said after giving a hard roundhouse kick to her assailant. She summoned her gauntlets and hit them together with a loud clang. “This must be how it’s trying to get rid of us. Steven would never tell it to hurt us, but he’s not himself, and that must be affecting the magic here. We have to figure out how to get him out of here before it’s too late!”

“And how are we supposed to do _that_?” Amethyst hissed, now simply running away from the shadowy monster. “He’s, like, a thousand feet in the air and we can’t _jump_ up there while these things are trying to _smash us_!”

“But Lion can!” Connie cut in, yelling above the wind, her head popping out from her hiding place. “Lion can get him out!”

“Lion’s gunna kill him if we bring him in here!” Amethyst shouted back as she ran by. “We gotta figure something else out!”

“We don’t have any other options!” Connie said, hitting her fist against the pillar. “Garnet said we need to get Steven out of here, and if none of _us_ can get up there, then we _need_ Lion!”

“She’s right! Amethyst, grab Connie and get out of the Temple,” Garnet ordered and Amethyst groaned before skidding a few feet and turning to run back to Connie.

“You guys be careful,” she called before hooking her arm around the girl behind the pillar, which knocked the breath out of her, and then Amethyst jumped back down the hole they had come through.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was much easier going down than going up, but there was still rocks to dodge. Amethyst had propped Connie over her shoulder as she maneuvered the crystal pipes, swinging off as they entered the next room. It was purple-blue and had huge piles of junk. Definitely Amethyst’s room, Connie concluded.

“I hope you can keep Lion under control long enough to get Steven out of here,” Amethyst said then, hurrying to the door as it stretched open. She ran right into Lion and she and Connie fell to the floor with a startled cry. Lion on the other hand had immediately started growling again.

Quickly Connie got to her feet and put her hands on Lion’s muzzle. “Lion, it’s okay! It’s okay, shhh,” she said, gently petting his nose. His head shook and he snorted but seemed to calm down. Connie sighed and carefully climbed onto Lion’s back. “Alright, let’s get back in there.”

Amethyst got up and nodded before turning around and opening the door again. “Hurry on in there. I’ll grab hold as he goes by.”

“Right. Okay, Lion,” Connie said, leaning forward to pat the big cat’s head, “We gotta get Steven out of the Temple. Can you do that? Please?”

Lion puffed, looking none too pleased at the mention of Steven, but he seemed to be listening all the same. He sprinted inside as the Temple shuddered and Amethyst just barely managed to grab his tail before he ran by. Connie helped her up and from there they instructed Lion on how to get to Rose’s room.

Up and up they went, the falling rocks proving to be only a small problem as Lion dodged around them. His eyes were locked forward, determination showing in his snarl. Amethyst looked as worried as ever, and Connie really hoped that Lion wouldn’t go off the rails when they got to the others.

Just get in and get Steven out, that’s all he had to do.

The noise of the storm grew louder by the second, just adding to the headache of the Temple falling to pieces, as Lion vaulted through floor after floor. He passed the Crystal Heart in a fraction of the time it took the Gems to get there, and before they knew it they were bursting back into Rose’s room.

Pearl and Garnet were still fighting several yards away, but were showing clear signs of exhaustion. However, as soon as Lion’s feet touched the ground, the attention of the monsters was torn away from the Gems, and focused on the pink cat instead. Amethyst jumped off his back and turned to Connie.

“I’m going to check on the others now that those things seem to be distracted,” she said, then pointed to the tower in the center of the room. Steven’s gem still flashed at the top, the light appearing even brighter now, almost bright enough to mask his form, which had grown even larger.

“That’s where Steven is, Lion. Go get him, and be quick!”

Lion nodded and ran off with Connie clinging to his fur as the shadowy creatures gave chase. The room had started falling apart now, holes like shattered glass opening up into blinding nothingness scattered throughout. Portal after portal shot out from Lion’s roar as he made his way to the tower, avoiding holes and cloud monsters as he went, the rain cascading down in a never-ending torrent. Connie felt drenched to the bone.

They reached the tower and Lion leaped up, his claws digging in. Connie held on for dear life as he forced himself up the side, using his portals to aid in the climb until he reached the top, where one last portal took the two several yards above.

The portal opened over Steven and they fell for just a moment before Lion sent out one last roar. As it shot out, Steven lifted his head and swung it around to face the two. Connie felt her chest tighten again; almost nothing of the boy was left. His body was that of a monster, covered in spikes and scales. Burning eyes glared as the portal formed below, and as Steven tumbled through Connie saw his body shift and grow and a horrifying and painful screech sounded as the pink gem flashed one last time.

Instantly the room quieted.

And that’s when everything came undone.


	5. Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He was nothing but a Monster.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CONTENT WARNING: This chapter contains depictions of Blood, Gore, Vomiting
> 
> Note: This chapter contains various headcanons about the monster and its abilities. Try and pick them all out!

A portal opened in the main room of the house and out came Lion and Connie. The landing was…ungraceful, to say the least, as Lion skidded and tumbled over himself, throwing Connie off his back. The two rolled and landed in a heap by the door, and there they lay in gasping silence.

Lion remained still, his breathing quick and eyes wide with a mixture of shock and fear as they fixed on the man hurrying over. Connie was lifting herself to her knees as Greg reached them, saying something that she couldn’t understand. Her heart was pounding so hard that it felt ready to break out of her chest, and she could barely breathe. Her eyes couldn’t focus on anything, and she felt like she was choking on air.

A moment later, she felt a strong pair of hands grab hold of her arms and she was lifted to her feet. Greg was trying to talk to her but nothing processed; all Connie could hear was the blood roaring in her ears. She felt the hands around her body guiding her somewhere and it took everything in her not to fall as she followed.

Carefully, Greg sat Connie down on the couch, and he crouched down in front of her. She forced her eyes to focus on him as best she could as he tried to direct her through the panic attack. Take deep breaths, hold on to me, focus on my face; she did her best to follow these instructions and, slowly, she felt her heart rate returning to normal.

Shortly after that the Temple door opened, from Amethyst’s room, and the Gems practically threw themselves out of it. They stumbled to a halt on the Warp Pad and took in the scene in front of them.

Greg and Connie were looking over to them as Lion finally struggled to his feet. There were claw marks from where he had skid along the floor. Connie was still breathing hard, but she was focused and present. Everyone stared at everyone else. The sound of waves came in through the windows.

“Lion.”

The cat lifted his head as Garnet walked forward. He gave a weak growl as she reached him, but it faded as her hand gently slid over his muzzle. She knelt in front of him and he moaned at her.

“You did a good job, Lion,” Garnet told him as she stroked his fur.

Amethyst looked incredulous as Garnet continued to pet the large feline, and even more so when she saw Pearl calmly walking over to Greg and Connie on the couch.

“You guys! We don’t have _time_ for this!” the purple Gem almost shouted, hands above her head. “We gotta find Steven! _Now!_”

“Amethyst, hush!” Pearl snapped. “We can’t just go _running off_. Lion is the only one who knows where Steven is, and we have to make sure he’ll still help us after all that. Give him a moment to calm down—I want to find Steven as much as you do, but forcing Lion won’t make things go any faster.”

Amethyst growled and crossed her arms, her foot tapping impatiently.

“Uh…Pearl? What does she mean by ‘_find_ him’?” Greg asked hesitantly.

Pearl bit her lip and looked around for a few seconds. The others made it a point to keep their eyes away from the man. Amethyst obviously regretted just blurting that information out, Garnet was still petting Lion, calming him down, and Connie was simply looking at her hands.

Pearl’s gaze shifted back to Greg. “Steven…we had to have Lion teleport him out of the Temple. Unfortunately, we have no idea where he was teleported _to_. But Lion knows. We just have to give him a few minutes before we go out…what we saw, it really hit us all hard—”

“_What_ did you see? What happened to my son?!” Greg gasped, quickly standing up and grabbing Pearl’s shoulders. They stared at each other and the Gem took a deep breath.

“I-I’m so sorry, Greg,” she said quietly. “We…we lost him.”

She felt the man’s hold on her shoulders weaken.

“He’s a monster, isn’t he? He turned into a monster,” he said before falling back onto the couch. His head was now in his hands and Pearl rubbed her arm. She had hoped to reveal that fact a bit…_softer_, had Amethyst not gone and dropped it like that, but perhaps it was better to just get it out of the way.

“I knew something bad happened when the Temple went silent like that,” Greg said into his hands. “My son is a monster…”

Pearl reached out to offer some comfort, but pulled back a second later when she saw Garnet stand up. Lion was rubbing his head against the Gem’s thigh as she turned to face the others and she had to gently push the cat’s face away. He huffed sadly and sat down, but still leaned against her leg, looking for comfort.

“Lion is ready,” Garnet stated and Lion seemed to grunt in agreement.

“Connie, will you come with us?” she asked next.

The girl nodded.

Garnet nodded back, and then looked toward Greg, as did the others.

“I’m sorry, Greg, but you’ll have to stay here,” Garnet told him sternly. Her tone suggested she had been expecting an argument, but Greg simply shook his head.

“I know I can’t go,” he stated, voice shaking, as he looked up. “If I came I’d only get in the way. I…I’ll stay here. It…feels better…” He took a breath. “Please, just, bring my son back.”

“We’ll do our best,” Garnet said in as optimistic a tone as she could muster. She wished she could _promise,_ but she knew that to promise would be to lie. Greg gave her a pained look of understanding and said no more.

Connie placed a comforting hand on Greg’s leg before leaving his side to join Garnet and Lion. Amethyst hurried over with Pearl next and everyone took a place on Lion’s back. He opened his portal and Greg was forced to watch them all leave, left to wonder how long it would take for them to return.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lion’s portal had taken them to a tall hill somewhere in the forest outside of Beach City. The hill overlooked most of the forest and provided a clear picture of the situation they were about to involve themselves in; Steven had grown even more since they saw him in the Temple, to a size bigger than almost anything they had faced in the past.

The monster towered above the trees, his long, fatty body held up with four thick arms and two powerful legs, all covered in thick scale plates. A broad neck held up his head, and his tail, which was as long as his body, swung absently, leveling trees as if they weren’t even there. His back was lined with huge, thorny spikes, from the top of his head, to the very tip of his tail. The faintest of pink glows came from underneath, the only tell that this creature was, in fact, Steven. A constant low rumble seemed to emanate from him.

“Connie, are you certain you can handle this?” Pearl asked, turning to the girl who was still stationed on Lion’s back. She was staring at Steven—the beast that was her best friend. Her eyes turned to her mentor at the question and her expression changed to steely resolve.

“I’m not going to abandon him. No matter what happens, I will stay and I will fight. I just need my sword.”

“Get your sword and go to Little Homeworld,” Garnet cut in before Pearl could respond. “Find Peridot. Have her contact the Diamonds directly. Tell them what’s happening and that we need their help as soon as possible, then sound the alarm. All the Gems there will know to evacuate. Afterwards, bring Peridot, Lapis, and Bismuth back with you.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Connie said, and with that Lion took off.

“A child shouldn’t have to go through something like this,” Pearl murmured and Garnet placed a hand on the other’s shoulder.

“So what exactly is the plan here, anyway?” Amethyst said next, looking as frustrated as ever. “You gotta have some kind of plan, right, Garnet? That’s why you want the Diamonds. Not sure what they can do, though. Yeah, they’re _big_, but Steven is _way_ bigger!”

“I want White specifically—the other two are just a bonus,” Garnet stated and both Pearl and Amethyst gave her a confused look. Then Pearl gasped, having connected the dots.

“You want White to use her mind control on Steven, don’t you?” she guessed and Garnet nodded.

“I’m not happy about it, of course, but it will be the quickest way to get Steven pacified. With White controlling him he won’t be able to hurt himself or anyone else. We’ll be able to relocate him as well. It will be best, for the time being, to take him off the planet. The Zoo should be substantial enough to hold him.”

“Will…that plan work? And what about Greg? We’re supposed to bring Steven _back_,” Amethyst said, anxiously rubbing her hands over each other as she looked out to the monster. He hadn’t moved much, but was visibly agitated and seemed to be venting frustration by uprooting the forest around him.

“And we will. Greg will just have to understand.”

Amethyst was about to say more, but was cut off when Steven suddenly let out a roar. All three turned in time to see him swing his hand in a horizontal arch. A line of trees fell following this action, and continued falling in the direction of the Gems. Whatever Steven had hit was coming in hot.

“Duck!” Garnet snapped and everyone hit the ground just in time to avoid getting slammed into by Jasper. She flew over them and Garnet quickly morphed her arm and snatched her out of the air. Jasper grunted when she hit the ground and she coughed a few times while trying to collect herself. Garnet's arm returned to its normal length and everyone got to their feet, including Jasper.

Upon seeing the Crystal Gems she took up a defensive stance. “W-what are you doing here?” she growled, teetering slightly. It was obvious that she was rather disoriented after that attack.

Before anyone could answer her question a portal opened between her and the Gems. Jasper groaned, arms dropping to her sides.

“_Now_ what?”

From the portal came Lion, mounted by Connie who now brandished her sword, as well as three newcomers: Peridot, Bismuth, and Lapis. Everyone dismounted and Peridot immediately launched into an update.

“I contacted the Diamonds as instructed,” she announced with a salute to Garnet. She then started tapping away at something on her tablet. “With the information they gave me, I calculate that they should be arriving within the hour. They’re taking one of Yellow’s battleships—luckily they didn’t decommission all of them, so they’ll have some actual speed this time instead of that snail’s pace those Diamond ships offer.”

She paused and looked to Jasper, who was wearing a confused scowl.

“Jasper.”

“Runt.”

The small Gem squinted and adjusted her visor before turning back to Garnet and the others.

“That’s all I have at this time.”

“Good. In the meantime, we have to keep Steven away from Little Homeworld,” Garnet directed.

As if to emphasize her point, a loud stomping started up, indicating that Steven had started walking. His heavy footsteps shook the entire forest and birds scattered in clouds above the treetops. Any other animals left in the area had surely started running from the thunder.

“So is _anyone_ going to explain what the heck’s going on here?” Jasper said over the noise. “Why does Steven have to stay out of Little Homeworld? Shouldn’t he be here to help take care of that thing? That’s what you all do, right? Take care of monsters.”

The others gave awkward glances to each other, then Garnet stepped up and went over to the aggravated Quartz. Jasper crossed her arms and sneered. The other gave no acknowledgement of the gesture, and it was dropped.

“Steven isn’t here because _he_ is the monster. He corrupted himself and turned into that thing,” Garnet stated and Jasper’s eyes widened. Then she started _laughing_, almost hysterically, holding her stomach.

“Okay, let me get this straight,” she said through her delight as everyone stared, speechless. “Steven, the kid who berated me for corrupting _myself_, went and did the same thing? That’s _great_.” She then cracked her knuckles and summoned her helmet. “Alright, I’ll help you take him out.”

“We’re not ‘taking him out’. We’re containing him until we can change him back to normal.”

Jasper gave Garnet a dissatisfied scoff. “Right, because ‘containing the monster’ has worked _so well _for you in the past,” she said, shooting a look over to Lapis, who scowled back. “But, fine, I’ll play your game. But when this doesn’t work we do things _my_ way. Deal?”

“Yeah? And what _is_ your way?” Bismuth said. She was holding a hand out in front of Lapis as a warning, which Jasper chuckled at.

“Garnet, I think we should go,” Pearl cut in, speaking too fast, as she grabbed onto Garnet’s arm. The tension was becoming too much, and they were wasting time. “Steven might be slow, but he’s big, and he’s covering a _lot_ of ground.”

Garnet looked over to the others and sighed. “Right. Let’s get this done.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Getting to Steven was made a little easier by the path of destroyed trees created when Jasper was swatted away, and the larger path of destruction created by Steven himself was also helpful in cutting back time. Still, it took longer than anyone would have wanted to reach him; he _was_ slow, but what he lacked in speed he made up for in reach. He’d already cleared at least one third of the distance to Little Homeworld by the time everyone caught up.

There hadn’t been any updates from the Diamonds yet, either, but Peridot assured that her calculations were correct and that they should be here very soon. Until then, everyone just had to keep Steven’s attention.

Capturing his attention was easy enough; one hit with Peridot’s mines was enough to bring him to a halt. His giant head swung around to look at where the mine had landed—there was a mark on his wrist where it had exploded, but otherwise the damage seemed minimal. Still, it had pulled his eyes from Little Homeworld, which is all they needed. Peridot managed to set off a few more mines before Steven spotted her hovering close by. She yelped and dropped out of the air as his huge jaws came to snap at her, steadying herself on her trash can lid once more several yards below the teeth.

“I can’t believe we have to do this,” Lapis said under her breath and Bismuth squeezed her shoulder.

“You know you don’t _have_ to,” Bismuth told the other. “You can go back to Little Homeworld and help everyone evacuate.”

“No, I’m staying here. The Off Colors can take care of the evacuation,” she said as her water wings sprang out from her gem. “I just…what I mean is that, I can’t believe we have to do _this_.” She waved her hand at Steven, who was searching for Peridot. “I can’t believe we have to _hurt Steven._”

Bismuth let out a deep sigh before picking up the trunk of a felled tree. “Not hurt, just distract.”

“Yeah. Whatever you have to tell yourself,” Lapis muttered before taking off to the sky. Bismuth watched her go before hefting the tree up and throwing it like a spear at the beast. It connected and splintered against his neck.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Everyone was doing their absolute best to keep Steven from leaving this area. Trees and boulders and spears and whips all cracked against him from the ground, while bombs and blades of water hit him from above. With so many angles of assault, and with so many things to focus on, keeping Steven where he was was thankfully not too difficult a task, at least.

This cacophony of attacks went on for some time before the Diamond battleship blinked into existence with a flash of light, causing Steven to cry out in shock as he was temporarily blinded. The ship touched down safely as the beast shook spots from his vision, and his attention was quickly taken back by the various Gems around him while Garnet dislodged herself from the fray. With Steven’s attention trained on the others, it was relatively easy for her to get out and hurry to the battleship. She reached it just as the Diamonds were exiting.

The familiar ball of light landed a few yards from Garnet. It slipped away and revealed the Diamonds and Spinel, who was sitting on Blue’s shoulder, in a fit of distress. When the Diamonds noticed the fusion at their feet all three fell to the ground, ready to ask questions. Garnet, however, did not give them the chance.

“Spinel, go help Bismuth,” she said the moment they were in earshot. Spinel looked hesitant, but dropped from Blue’s shoulder.

“I’ll do my best,” she said before running down toward Steven and the others.

“Oh, will she be alright?” Blue said as she watched Spinel hurry off. “She could get hurt—”

“She can handle herself,” Garnet said and clapped her gauntlets together, calling their attention back to her. “Now, you three listen to me. I need you to use your powers to get Steven under control. White, your power should be enough, but Blue and Yellow can use theirs to weaken him if needed.”

“You want us to use our _powers_ on him?” Blue gasped, clasping her hands against her gem.

“But-Steven told us to _never_ use our powers on others ever again,” White added, indignation in her voice.

“You realize what you’re asking of us, don’t you?” Yellow continued, leaning down on her elbow, closer to Garnet. “You are asking us to go against Steven’s direct wishes! Can we not just—hold him down or something?” she suggested, waving her hand around.

“I respect your hesitance to stray from Steven’s requests, but even you three can’t hold _that_ down,” Garnet said, pointing toward the giant creature that was Steven. He roared and snapped his jaws at Lapis and Peridot and swung his tail to try and hit any other Gems on the ground. Countless trees and boulders lay shattered under and around his feet.

“The others can only keep his attention for so long. I need you to get him under your control before he realizes you’re here. It will be easier, and faster, if you surprise him.” Garnet was speaking directly to White Diamond now, who had her fingers to her lips. She was looking from Garnet to Steven and back, concern and confusion written on her face.

“I suppose it would be fastest if you did it, White,” Blue mused with some minor apprehension.

“And your power won’t hurt him the same way mine would,” Yellow added with a sigh.

“Is there truly no other way?” White moaned and Garnet shook her head.

“I wouldn’t have had Peridot send for you if I knew of another.”

The Diamonds looked at each other and, one after the other, stood up to their full heights.

“I hope he can forgive me for this once this is all over,” White murmured.

“I’m sure he’ll understand, White. Steven’s very good at that,” Blue said and Garnet took that as her queue to rejoin the others.

She added herself to the distractions, rocketing her gauntlets to slam against Steven. Everyone had to keep his attention, just for a few more minutes, and then it would be over for the time being. Maybe, once he’s off the planet, he’ll even calm down when White retracts her control.

That wasn’t something to think about now, though. The Diamonds had found an elevated section of the woods around Steven where the other Gems could see them. The others started circling back together, opposite the Diamonds, to keep Steven from catching them. White still looked very hesitant, as did the other two, but with some coaxing from Yellow and Blue she seemed to stand just a little taller.

She closed her eyes and steadied herself and the Gems quickly took cover. Steven appeared confused at this and angrily started scanning low to the ground to find them all in what was left of the trees around him. Then he was hit with White’s beam and he swung his head up and roared.

Everyone watched as he fought to keep control. This, of course, was worrying, because even the other Diamonds had not been able to resist White’s control for more than a few moments. But even so, it appeared as if Steven was losing. The color was draining from his body and his efforts were weakening. The Gems started to carefully reappear from within the trees, looking relieved that the plan had worked.

But then Steven roared again. It sounded different, more strained and guttural. The sound shook the ground as a powerful shockwave spread out with a harsh gust of wind that threw everyone back. The Diamonds suddenly looked fearful and White had even fallen slightly.

Something was _very _wrong.

The color had started to creep back as Steven forced himself to move. At that same moment, Blue and Yellow started to hit him with their own powers. It knocked him back a few feet, but otherwise didn’t appear to do much damage. In fact, aside from the initial connection, Yellow and Blue’s attacks didn’t appear to do _anything_.

Now Steven had turned to face the Diamonds head on. The color was returning faster now, and the Gems behind him could see the glow from his stomach growing stronger; and then there was a new light from above.

Somehow, Steven had regained control of himself and had turned White’s attack back at her. A flash of bright pink shot out and for a moment, things were quiet. Then Steven raised his head further, and the Gems saw Yellow and Blue fall back in shock as White rose to her feet.

Connie and Lion found their way to Garnet, towing Amethyst, Peridot, and Spinel along with them. Lapis, Bismuth, and Pearl quickly found their way over as well, with Jasper bringing up the rear, and Garnet ushered them all further back behind the broken treeline.

“We’re in trouble,” was all the fusion said as they watched White face her companions.

White Diamond was clearly fighting with herself as Steven silently commanded her, her body taken over by a dark pink-ish purple. Her movements were somewhat scattered and she’d jerk every few seconds, trying to win herself back. A gurgling rumble came from Steven’s chest as White’s companions watched, horrified, as she was forced to advance toward them.

“Uh, Garnet?” came Amethyst’s quiet voice, “What do we do?”

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe if we get his attention again, White will be able to free herself,” Connie suggested, doing her best to sound confident in her idea.

“Whether that works or not, it’s better than just standing around,” Bismuth said. “I think we’ll have to get more aggressive, though, huh” she added and Garnet muttered something under her breath, but nodded.

“Get aggressive, but don’t take it too far,” she said, shooting a look toward Jasper, who huffed and crossed her arms.

“Okay, let’s do this thing. Spinel, come back with me. I’ve got an idea,” Bismuth said, grabbing Spinel’s arm and pulling her away.

“Pearl, let’s get Opal out there,” Amethyst said and Pearl gave a grunt of agreement, and then the two ran off, following Bismuth and Spinel.

“You two get back in the air,” Garnet told Lapis and Peridot. “Jasper, you’re with me.”

“Oh, what? Why?”

“I need to keep an eye on you.”

“What about the kid?” Jasper asked, jabbing her thumb toward Connie.

“I have Lion, he can keep me safe,” Connie shot back and Lion growled a confirmation.

“Fine,” Jasper huffed and begrudgingly followed Garnet, and Connie and Lion ran back out a moment later.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A boulder cracked against the back of Steven’s head and he growled in annoyance. When he turned around to see where the rock had come from, another slammed right into his nose and he groaned, shaking his head.

“Bullseye!” Spinel said with a grin, which immediately vanished. “I hope we didn’t hurt him, though…”

She had her arms and legs wrapped around two sturdy trees while Bismuth used her as a slingshot—very effective.

“Eh, look at ‘im! I don’t think those last two really did more than be a slight inconvenience,” Bismuth said as she planted another boulder in front of Spinel. “Which, I mean, is good I guess? It’s enough to get him off the Diamonds, anyway...though, I can’t really tell if it actually _did _anything with the big guy in the way.”

She looked quite uncertain as she pulled the next shot back.

“I hope the others get in there soon before he finds us,” Spinel said, fearful awkwardness in her voice.

“Yeeeaah…”

Bismuth sucked air through her teeth as Steven started to hone in on the two.

“Let’s go for the horns next.”

Meanwhile, Lapis and Peridot were in the air about to enact their own plan. Peridot noticed Steven’s slow advance toward Bismuth and Spinel as more boulders were slung, and motioned for her companion to hurry up.

“Come on, come on, we gotta get him off those two!” she said, teetering on her trash can lid as she leaned to look down at the two other Gems.

“Working on it,” Lapis grunted. She was capturing at least a dozen of Peridot’s bombs in spheres of water. “Is this even going to work? What if it makes the water _too _hot and it evaporates?”

Peridot waved her off. “Nah, trust me. I know what temperature those bombs explode at, it’s not _that _high. Not when it’s those little things.”

Lapis sighed and enclosed the last four bombs, then pulled them in a bit so it would be easier to aim. “Okay, detonate them, then.”

Something was tapped on Peridot’s tablet and all the bombs exploded at once. The bubbles of water were boiling now, just as she said they would. “Ha! And you doubted my abilities.”

Lapis rolled her eyes and lifted her arms up. “Sorry, Steven,” she said before throwing them forward, the boiling water flying down with the motion. The water seared against Steven’s hide and he roared in pain before turning to look at the two.

“Head’s up!” Lapis shouted as a beam of pink shot from Steven’s mouth.

Peridot yelped and dropped, a little too fast this time around, and only _just _managed to catch herself before careening into the ground. A second later she saw a dark shadow appear over her and with a deep sense of dread, she looked up.

A huge hand came crashing down on her.

“Peridot!” came Lapis’ terrified scream and she quickly flew down as Steven’s hand retreated. She landed and hurried to the huge footprint, finding Peridot’s gem dead center. Clumsy hands snatched it off the ground, and the feeling of relief that followed brought Lapis to her knees.

Somehow, Peridot made it out with only a crack in her gem. Thank goodness for Era 2 Peridots.

Then, before she could realize what was happening, Steven’s tail came swinging down. All Lapis had time to do was raise her water wings before the tail connected with a force that sent her flying who knows how fast or how far into the trees.

“Lapis and Peridot are out!” Connie said as she and Lion appeared beside Garnet and Jasper. Connie had still been figuring out a plan for her and the cat, so she’d been observing the others. Unfortunately, that meant she had to watch everything that just happened. She was really starting to think that maybe she shouldn’t be here after all.

“Great, there goes our air force,” Jasper grumbled. “This isn’t working.”

“We still have Gems left,” Garnet stated in as stern a voice as she could.

“Yeah, you think? Look! He’s distracted and White’s still _purple_,” the soldier growled back. Garnet, Connie, and Lion all looked and, sure enough, nothing had changed with the Diamonds.

A stream of glowing arrows cut across their vision then, scattering across Steven’s side. Immediately he was on Opal, giving chase around the clearing he’d made as the fusion ran and jumped and dodged around him with a graceful air, all the while sending arrows at the monster.

“Come on, I’m tired of standing here watching the light show,” Jasper said as Opal dashed by, hounded by the enraged purple beast. The ground thundered as he passed and Connie tightened her grip on Lion's mane to keep from falling off his back. She wasn’t sure if Opal was helping the situation or making it worse with all the rampaging.

When she lifted her head she saw Garnet and Jasper running out, and Lion shook his fur in anticipation, ready to follow. Connie saw a determined snarl on his face and she took a deep breath, tightening her grip around the sword in her hand.

“Let’s get out there, Lion.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Any other day, Yellow would have been able to best White in a fight. White wasn't a bad warrior, by any means; she knew her way around a battlefield. Yellow, however, was still physically the strongest and most skilled of the Diamonds. Now, though, she struggled. Even though Steven was distracted, his control over White was still tremendous, and it seemed that his own strength had been given to Diamond under his spell. Not only that, but it seemed like White wasn’t even _fighting _Steven’s control anymore. She was completely gone.

Yellow continued to struggle in holding White back, even with Blue doing her best to alleviate some of the force. Yellow had White’s wrists tight in either hand, but the larger Diamond was really wearing on her strength. Even while using her disruption power, an aura glowing from her hands and causing a circuit board of light along White’s arms, Yellow found herself losing.

Blue was trying to help by pulling White back, unable to use her own powers due to Yellow’s proximity. She felt somewhat helpless because of this; out of all the Diamonds, she was the least versed when it came to fighting, especially without her powers. But, to use them would be even more detrimental to their predicament.

“Ghn—Blue, get out of here!” Yellow said through grit teeth. Her heels dug into the ground as she tried to force White back.

“But, you need help!” Blue protested, pulling harder.

“No! You’re better off helping the others!”

Very reluctantly, Blue obeyed and released her grip. Yellow was right, but at the same time she couldn’t just _leave_ her. White was obviously overpowering the other, having even started to force her open hand toward Yellow’s gem.

Blue nervously looked around for anything to give her an idea. Her eyes locked on something and she gasped. “I’ll be right back!” she said before running off.

“No, Blue-! Gah-don’t come back-!” Yellow grunted as White pushed forward, the pink in her eyes glowing even brighter with Steven’s power.

Yellow was forced to take a knee as a brace, but the effectiveness was little. Both hands were now holding onto White’s wrist as her sharp nails reached Yellow’s chest. The nails dug in around her gem as White’s fingers latched onto the cold stone. Now Yellow found herself trying to hold White’s hand _closer _as the other started to pull away.

Yellow’s eyes shut and her jaw locked from the pain as her gem was slowly pulled from her body, her hold on White weakening. She was down on both knees now, her entire body shaking with the immense effort of simply holding herself up. Her powers faded as the stone continued to be tugged out and her body started falling apart.

She could just hear the rapid steps of Blue running back.

“Y-you’re too late, Blue,” she coughed out, fully relinquishing her hold. In an instant her gem was ripped from her chest. In that same moment, Blue forced one of Yellow’s swords, which she’d found on the ship, through White’s stomach. White stiffened, Yellow’s gem falling from her fingers, and the purple-pink color faded from her body.

There was just enough time for her to look down at Blue, and she saw her own feelings of fear and defeat reflected on Blue’s face.

Then she was gone, and Blue dropped the sword to catch White’s gem. Falling to her knees, she gently lifted Yellow’s off the ground and carefully cradled both against her chest.

“Oh, Steven…” she sighed, looking out to the monster, “We weren’t much help, after all.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“The Diamonds are down!” came Opal’s shout from above. She had danced onto Steven’s back and was actively rearranging herself as he squirmed, trying to knock her off. He bucked and rolled and twisted, trying to get at her. Fortunately, the one thing this new body of his _didn’t _offer was flexibility, and she managed to keep her position with relative ease. Thankfully she didn't have to worry about boulders hurtling toward them, either—upon seeing her perch, Bismuth and Spinel had stopped slingshotting the rocks. Now, they were off gathering more ammo.

Jasper crashed into Steven's leg in a whirl, grinded against the thick hide, and jumped back with a frustrated yell. She could barely scratch this thing. Not even with Garnet’s added electricity could she do anything to him. Steven just shook everything off. The only things that did actual, visible damage were Opal's arrows, which left pock marks that oozed small trickles of blood all across Steven's body, and Connie's blade, which caused a blanket of slashes on his hands and feet, and anything else Lion managed to reach for her.

“Perhaps there’s something else we could try?” Opal said as Steven started getting more sporadic with his movements. She wobbled and jumped when he threw himself into a rearing position. He snapped at the fusion as she vaulted over his nose, which she shot with a few arrows, before falling to the ground.

She sprinted past Lion and Connie as Steven came back down to continue his chase. Connie saw his eyes widen slightly then just as his face charged by, and Steven suddenly spun the other way, throwing his body up and using his weight to quicken the turn. Lion growled and fumbled to dodge Steven’s huge tail as it swung along the ground.

Opal’s path was cut off as the monster fell to the ground in front of her, a fierce fire burning in his black eyes. She cursed and raised her bow, acting on instinct rather than logic, which ended up being a very big mistake.

Before she could even loose the next round of arrows, Steven’s jaws descended. In that same instant, Opal came undone and Amethyst was thrown to the ground as Pearl was snapped in half by Steven’s teeth.

“Pearl! Let her go!” Amethyst screamed, jumping to her feet and hitting Steven with her whip as hard as she possibly could. He growled, then squealed when the whip slashed his eye. His mouth opened as he jerked back and Amethyst leaped up and caught the pretty pearl that fell from his tongue.

“Geez, P, why’d you go and do that?” she sighed before turning tail and running toward the woods. That’s all she could think to do now—run to the woods. Maybe she could help Bismuth and Spinel with the boulders? Or maybe she and Garnet could try Sugilite?

Actually, with how unstable Garnet was right now, Sugilite would probably just make everything even worse. _If _they were even able to hold her together.

“Ah, man…”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Connie gasped and yelped as Lion stumbled, trying to dodge Steven’s hands and feet as he reacted to whatever had happened after catching Opal. A portal was summoned and Lion vaulted through it as Steven’s foot crashed down, exiting a second portal a moment later just a few yards away, into a cloud of dirt and dust.

Connie coughed as Lion went to summon another portal, but the portal never came. Before the roar even started, both were knocked back as Steven’s hand swatted at them blindly through the cloud. The shock of it caused Connie to lose her grip on Lion’s fur, and they both went flying.

With a hard grunt, Connie hit the ground and rolled. She managed to catch herself with her elbow and knee, abruptly stopping her movement, and she coughed some more.

A few seconds later she heard Amethyst shouting from somewhere, and when she picked her head up to look, she saw the purple Gem waving frantically. Then Connie looked up and her face blanched as a huge hand came down to crush her.

Moments after the hand crashed down, Steven shrieked in pain. The hand that was about to squash Connie was rapidly lifted up, and Amethyst cheered with relief when she saw why; there was Connie, hanging from her sword, which was embedded in Steven’s palm.

The girl looked up, wide-eyed and bewildered at what had just happened. Her eyes went wider when Steven started swinging his hand back and forth to try and dislodge her and she felt her hands slipping. She could see herself moving further and further away from the ground and panic started to rise in her stomach before one of Lion’s portals opened beneath her.

Out came Lion with Garnet on his back, and Connie had the wind knocked out of her as Garnet’s arm hooked around her abdomen. Her shoulders screamed with pain as the sword was yanked free and down the three fell into another of Lion’s portals.

The next portal that opened was further back in the forest, and as Lion landed Connie saw the others gathered there, hidden under the dark shade of the trees. Once on solid ground, Garnet silently slid to the ground, gave Lion’s nose a pat, then looked to Jasper. Connie’s eyes followed, and she saw Jasper standing there with a very smug look on her face.

“Has Lapis reappeared?” Garnet asked under her breath and Bismuth sighed and shook her head.

“I, uh, found Peridot’s gem when we were collecting boulders,” Spinel muttered, holding the stone up. “She’s cracked, but otherwise not in bad shape.”

“Lapis must have dropped it when Steven hit her,” Connie said as Garnet received the stone.

“So,” Jasper piped in, “Are you ready to admit this isn’t gunna work?”

Garnet’s fingers tightened around the green gem in her palm and her free hand curled into a shaking fist. She said nothing.

Jasper huffed and turned her eyes to Connie, who flinched under the hard gaze.

“Gimme that sword.”

_“What?!”_

“You heard me!”

Jasper stomped over and made to grab it, but Connie quickly rolled off Lion’s back and got into a defensive stance, holding the weapon up. The huge Gem standing in front of her clenched her jaw and Connie took a step back in a moment of fear.

“Listen, Connie.”

Connie faltered, caught off guard by having been referred to by name. She didn’t know Jasper even _knew _her name. She lowered her sword and stood up a little straighter, caution on her face.

“Listen,” Jasper repeated, and Connie obeyed, as did everyone else. What they heard were grumbles and roars as Steven continued to rampage, nothing but a monster left around his gem. There was the sound of crunching metal as what could only be Yellow Diamond’s ship was smashed, or bitten, or hammered into the ground. The sky lit up briefly in a brilliant pink.

“Give me the sword.”

Connie looked up to Jasper and hugged the sword close to her chest, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. She took a few steps away.

She jolted as another roar echoed through the trees.

“Look, kid, you either hand over the sword, or you’re doing this yourself.”

“Fine.”

The word slipped from her lips before she could even form it in her mind. Connie looked up once more. The face she saw wasn’t what she expected, wasn’t one she was _used _to.

Jasper’s expression was calm, solemn, not proud or triumphant, or anything else she had imagined it would be.

“Look me in the eye and tell me that you want to do this.”

Connie stood up in full, brows furrowed and tears falling from her eyes, as she stared. Her shaking fingers tightened around the hilt of her beautiful orange-pink sword, and she forced air in and out of her lungs.

“You knew it would come to this,” she heard Jasper say and she whimpered in response.

Yet another roar rang out.

Connie looked toward the others and found no reassurance, no hope, no...anything.

It was finally time for a new idea.

Eyes returned to Jasper as she came closer and Connie fell to her knees. The sword was hugged closer as she cried silent tears, watching as the Gem that used to be so filled with hate crouched in front of her. Connie couldn’t see any hate in this Gem now.

“It _is _‘Connie’, right?”

The girl nodded.

“Steven doesn’t think I listen when he talks, but I do. He has a lot of admiration for you. Do you know that? He always talked about how skilled and how brave you are.”

She didn’t know how to answer. The Gem sighed.

“I’ll ask again,” and Jasper’s fingers were around Connie’s arm, a shocking gentleness as she was lifted to her feet. “_Do you want to do this?_”

“You don’t gotta do anything you don’t want to, Connie,” Bismuth said softly and Connie flexed her fingers around the sword’s hilt.

Then she wiped the tears from her eyes and locked her gaze with Jasper’s. If anyone was going to do this, it should be her. She knew that in the deepest recesses of her heart. _It's what Steven would want_.

“I’m sorry it ended up like this, kid,” Jasper said, lifting Connie off the ground. Before the girl could say anything, Jasper had kicked off the ground and was whirling toward the clearing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Jasper jumped out of the spin and landed on her feet, Connie saw that they were at the edge of the chaos, watching as Steven stormed about, having gone past the destroyed battleship and walking toward the closest and clearest item of interest: Little Homeworld.

“I’m going to take you to Steven. Be ready with that sword of yours, because the next time I stop, you’re getting thrown.”

“Wait, what?” Connie gasped and Jasper chuckled.

“Act on instinct, kid.”

And that was that.

Jasper kicked off again and Connie felt her stomach turn at the speed, though thankfully her mind was so preoccupied that the actual motion didn’t hit her too badly.

She felt Jasper lurch as she hit a bump, and the next thing she knew they were above Steven, apparently having used his own body as a ramp.

“Alright, runt, you’re up!” Jasper said and Connie found herself being thrown down toward the roaring creature below, nothing but anger staring back as he tried to reach up to them. A pink flame started to rise in the beast’s throat, a rather unsettling and strange sight to the girl who was falling right into it.

A flash of orange connected to the jaw and it snapped shut as Jasper slammed herself into Steven, and he fell heavy onto his hands. As he shook his head, Connie found herself shifting as she plummeted, sword held high above her head.

Wind shrieked in her ears as she fell, and she saw Steven look back to her and roar. She closed her eyes, a stark blackness swelling in her heart and mind as she accepted her mission completely.

The sword came down.

Then the screaming stopped, replaced by a gurgling, bubbling silence.

The sword had sunk deep into Steven’s forehead, all the way up to the hilt, sticking out from between his eyes; eyes that were so fierce just moments ago, now staring vacantly up at the sky. Thick, red blood oozed from the wound as Connie crouched, leaning heavily on her weapon, her knuckles white around the hilt. Everything hurt, the shock from the impact washing over her, but at least nothing felt broken after that landing.

She looked down as she felt her sword jerk.

Blinding light shot out around the blade and huge cracks erupted from the wound. They ran down Steven’s body, blood and white light seeping and shining from the deep gouges. The blood was heavy, sticky, and pooled at his hands and feet. Then, after what felt like an eternity, he began to fall.

Connie held onto her sword for dear life as Steven collapsed. Despite his size, his fall was slow, and he crashed onto his side in a lake of his own blood. The fluid splashed up and splattered against the girl hanging from her sword and a wave of nausea washed over her.

She managed to force the feeling down long enough to plant her feet against the purple scales holding onto her sword. With a few hard tugs her weapon was pulled free, accompanied by a sickening squelch noise, and then both knight and sword tumbled to the ground, down into the pool of red. She felt the sickness rapidly returning as she forced herself onto her hands and knees, out of the blood now soaking through her clothes. She couldn't stop the stinging acid rising in her throat anymore, her body heaving as her stomach forced everything out.

Once her stomach was sufficiently empty, with her breathing heavy and her throat on fire, Connie began to stand up. She wiped her mouth carefully to avoid the red wetness staining most of her sleeve, and looked back at the Gems. She saw that Garnet had split, Ruby and Sapphire huddled against Amethyst, who was on her knees with her face turned away, tears streaming from her eyes. Bismuth was holding Spinel, who looked like she could poof at any moment with how hard she clung to the other, and Blue Diamond loomed overhead, with the gems of her companions in her hands. Finally, Connie saw Jasper standing several yards away, and she could tell that even the stoic soldier was forcing herself to look unaffected by what had just happened.

For the first time since arriving in the forest, everything was perfectly silent.

And then a rumbling started up and all eyes turned to Steven. The cracks along his body had started projecting beams of light again, the canyons slowly growing, until the light abruptly vanished. Then his entire body was instantly engulfed in light, which exploded off of him in a cloud of familiar butterflies. They formed a spiraling wall around him, came together, flew apart. The display was mesmerizing, demanding of attention; they danced beautifully in the clearing, intertwining streams of light, breaking a few moments later to rush out in all directions.

A stream came and circled around Connie, and she held her arms up in an attempt to block the force of motion. Even with her eyes closed, the light from the butterflies filled her vision. Wind rushed around her, a thunderous sound of flapping wings, threatening to knock her to the ground.

And then they were gone, as quickly as they had appeared.

The strange white-blue creatures dissipated into the sky and what was left behind brought a new wave of tears to everyone. Even Jasper shook at what she saw. The blood was gone—and so was the beast.

Left behind, where the huge monster had lain just a few seconds before, was the naked body of a boy. He was unmoving, his gem glowing faintly and slowly dimming. His body had splotches of color, scars left over from the monster, and two horns still stuck out from his forehead.

No one knew what to do, what to say.

Then Connie was sprinting full speed toward him, her sword forgotten on the beaten ground. She heard the various footsteps of the others as she ran, following her actions. She almost tripped and practically fell as she reached Steven, her shock, panic, and confusion taking over her body. Quickly, she lifted her friend’s head onto her lap. She pressed her fingers against his neck, the only thing she could think to do. She waited.

The others gathered around her, and Blue’s quiet shadow hovered over the group.

Now they _all _waited.

And Connie let out a strangled sob as her hands moved to cup Steven’s cheeks. All she could give to the others was a simple shake of her head as her tears fell, gently splashing against Steven’s face. Her body shook violently and she leaned down to rest her forehead against Steven’s as her sobbing grew heavier. She could feel the others’ hands on her as grief spread through the group. Even Blue Diamond couldn’t hold back her magical tears any longer, despite her very best efforts.

Everyone cried and wailed. It’s all they could do. But then something caused Connie’s body to stiffen and she sat up just an inch. She’d _felt _something, something barely there, something that rustled her bangs and brushed against her skin. Hands were removed from her back and she heard Sapphire whisper her name, voice soft and questioning. Everyone listened for an answer.

Connie rubbed the tears from her eyes—with little success—before carefully moving her hand to hover closely over Steven’s slightly parted mouth. Her hand stayed still for a long time, but eventually she felt it; the faintest of breaths escaped the boy’s lips.

Her sorrowful tears were replaced with new ones, tears of joy as a ridiculous, unbelievable laughter took over.

He was alive.

“Steven’s _alive_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So this took two months to write.  
Anyway, hope you all liked this chapter! Just one more to go! And it shouldn't take two months to write this time (or be 20 pages long haha) (P.S. if you see any typos please tell me lol)
> 
> Also, if you've been enjoying this story, I'd really appreciate it if you could give it a reblog on Tumblr! [[Here's a link]](https://tiggyloo.tumblr.com/post/188774954778/cant-hold-on-chapter-1-pain) Thanks so much! ( And thanks for all the comments! I don't always reply to them, but I read every one! <3 )


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